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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24877579">Private Dancer</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/addict_writer/pseuds/addict_writer'>addict_writer</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Queer as Folk (US)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drama, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Exploitation, Friendship, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, One Shot, Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:35:44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>34,291</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24877579</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/addict_writer/pseuds/addict_writer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After being thrown on the streets by his own family, Justin accepts the first offer to get some money, even though the outcome is denigrating. He ends up as one of the dancers at Boys Peep Show. Brian is trying to escape his miserable life by visiting the very establishment Justin works in. When Brian decides to end his marriage with his best friend, he chooses to save Justin from the terrible life he has.<br/>This story is about the journey to finding friendship, rediscovering love, reconnecting with family.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Bruckner/Michael Novotny, Brian Kinney/Justin Taylor (Queer as Folk), Brian Kinney/Michael Novotny (Queer as Folk)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>50</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Private Dancer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>The title is inspired by the song Private Dancer bu Tina Turner.<br/>Many thanks to Kim for helping me make this an easy read.<br/>Buckle up for a long one-shot!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>
  
</p><p>All the men that came to these places were all the same. You didn't look at their faces and you didn't ask their names. You didn't think of them as human. You didn't think of them at all.</p><p>You kept your mind on the money, keeping your eyes on the wall.</p><p>It hadn’t taken long for Justin to learn that his best asset was his ass. He was currently shaking it at the window, keeping his eyes closed. If he let the music consume him, he could imagine he was in his old bedroom at home dancing in front of the mirror.</p><p>“Closer,” the rough voice from behind the glass reminded him he wasn’t in his old bedroom.</p><p>Justin walked backwards, pressing his ass to the window, sliding it up and down.</p><p>“Take them off.”</p><p>He knew that Sap would know if he hadn’t obeyed the client. But Justin was holding onto whatever was left of his dignity.</p><p>He pulled at the elastic band of his briefs, slowly rolling them over his ass. In his head he was counting the seconds until the curtain would shield him.</p><p>It always stayed up for a minute, but Justin had no idea how many coins the man had fed the machine. He hoped the curtain would fall before his ass was on display.</p><p>Just as the fabric of his underwear was over the globes of his ass the curtain fell.</p><p>Justin waited for more coins to be fed into the machine, but all he heard from the other side was a curse, then the door opening.</p><p>He breathed a sigh of relief.</p><p>Wrapping the robe around his body, he pushed the button that informed the reception he was unavailable as he made his way to the bathroom. The clock in the hallway read 2am. At least two more hours of business, unless Sap took pity on him and sent him home early.</p><p>Justin was cleaning his hands when a hand touched his shoulder. He jumped, not expecting anyone in the bathroom.</p><p>“It’s just me.”</p><p>“Hey, Todd,” Justin mumbled.</p><p>“Rough night?”</p><p>“You know it. It’s my first break since we started tonight.”</p><p>“How about we grab a bite?” Todd led him out of the bathroom. “And don’t worry about Sap. He doesn’t want his best boytoy to faint while performing.”</p><p>Justin smiled meekly, following Todd to Sap’s office.</p><p>“Hey, boss! I’m taking Justin to the diner for some grub.”</p><p>“Sure. You can head home after.” Sap nodded from his desk. He had several monitors on the wall before him, showing him each room in the club.</p><p>“He’s in a good mood lately,” Todd commented while they got dressed in their street clothes.</p><p>Justin focused on buckling his belt. He knew why Sap was nice. Justin was there to blow him whenever the man wanted. Just the thought of the sleaze's dick made him want to vomit.</p><p>“You haven’t accepted your new life yet,” Todd said.</p><p>Justin wrapped his arms around himself as they stepped onto the street through a backdoor. His denim jacket wasn’t warm enough for the late autumn weather.</p><p>“You’ve been here the longest. How can you stand it?” Justin asked.</p><p>“Once Sap’s gotten enough of you, you’ll see that life here is not so bad. You’re safe behind that glass. The ones in the private rooms have it rough sometimes.”</p><p>Justin shivered. He hoped Sap would never promote him.</p><p>“Look.” Todd stopped in the middle of the street. Justin met his eyes, curiously. “You have a roof above your head, you have a mattress and a blanket of your own. You’re safe. When I first came to Pittsburgh I slept in the park. Then my backpack was stolen. I stumbled upon Sap by mistake, trying to get some cash.”</p><p>Justin looked away.</p><p>“We’re lucky,” Todd stated loudly, tugging on Justin’s chin.</p><p>Justin didn’t consider himself lucky at all. If he was lucky, he’d still be at home with his family. But they hated him for who he was and kicked him out onto the streets.</p><p>On his third night on the streets, Justin had tried getting into Babylon, which was supposed to be the best gay dance club. The owner had rescued him from the mean bouncer and offered him a place in his house. Justin soon learned that Sap kept homeless boys and exploited them for money.</p><p>He got his own money out of it, which was good enough for him. Even so, Justin kept trying to find a way out of Sap’s claws.</p><p>A whole year had passed since he’d met Sap, and things had gotten worse for him. Sap had made him blow him for the job and home he was offering him, but then he’d treated Justin just like any other boy under his roof. That is, until a couple of months ago, when he’d summoned Justin to his room at home and told him to keep his dick warm while he did the taxes.</p><p>Justin had no idea why him, but it made him want to leave even more, although the thought of sleeping in the park scared him more than whatever Sap had planned for him. Because it was clear Sap was training him for something bigger.</p><p>Todd opened the diner’s door, and in they went. The waitress smiled warmly at them, already asking the cook for burgers and fries. She brought them each a Coke.</p><p>Justin had learned over time that Debbie was genuinely nice and sweet.</p><p>Todd kept yapping about how grateful Justin should be while they ate. On their way home, Justin muttered that he was tired, which made Todd finally shut up.</p><p>Justin fell face first on his mattress, wrapping his body in the thin blanket. He squeezed his eyes, trying to will the tears away, but they stubbornly wet his face. Yet another night when he fell asleep crying.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>The following night had Justin rotating in his chair behind the window, thinking of what a normal seventeen-year-old would do at ten on a Sunday night. Probably sleeping, he realized.</p><p>He jumped out of his daydream when he heard the telltale sound of coins in the machine. One of them only.</p><p>Justin slowly rose from the chair walking into the middle of his tiny room.</p><p>The man behind the glass was staring warily at him. Ah, Justin had heard of his type. The other boys had told him all about the Stepford husbands looking for something to spice up their dull life. And he’d had a few of them in the past months.</p><p>Though when the man’s eyes met his, Justin could see only desire – so many kinds of desire. He didn’t look like the usual hetero husband.</p><p>Before Justin could ask what he could do, the curtain fell.</p><p>Oh, well.</p><p>“Fuck!” He heard the man cursing. More coins were fed to the machine. About a dozen of them.</p><p>Justin beamed as the curtain lifted. The man relaxed in his chair.</p><p>“What can I do for you tonight?” Justin asked, toying with a button of his shirt.</p><p>“I want to see your body.”</p><p>Justin blinked. No one had requested something like that so boldly.</p><p>He had less than ten minutes. If he timed his dance perfectly, the curtain would close before he was completely naked.</p><p>Justin scrolled through the playlist on the tablet pinned to the wall. Smirking to himself, he chose one of his favorites: <em>Private Dancer</em> by Tina Turner. The remastered version.</p><p>As the sax started, Justin moved to the middle of his boxed room. He started undulating his hips, licking at his lips. Unlike other times when he kept his eyes closed or on the wall behind his client, this time he looked right at him.</p><p>Slowly, he unbuttoned his shirt, uncovering one shoulder, then spinning around and showing the man some of his back, before pulling the shirt back. Keeping his back to the man, he pushed the shirt over his shoulders, leaving it hanging around his elbows, then in an expert move, he had it off and thrown in the corner of the room.</p><p>Justin smiled at the gasp he elicited from the man.</p><p>He spat on his palm, trailing a hand up from his stomach to his right nipple. Justin threw his head back as he twisted the nipple between his fingers. He moaned loudly as the sax hit again loudly in the song.</p><p>Justin popped open the button of his pants, stealing a look at his client. The man had his dick out and was pumping steadily.</p><p>Justin gulped, focusing on his task. He let his pants pool at his feet. Instead of turning around and pushing his ass against the window like he usually did, he threw himself at the window. The man in front of him startled, but jizz erupted from his cock when he noticed Justin fucking against the glass separating them.</p><p>Justin was so turned on that he forgot about Sap’s rule to never come in front of a client. Unless asked to do so, of course. He kept pushing his dick against the glass, looking at the man through lust-hooded eyes.</p><p>“Talk to me,” Justin breathed out.</p><p>The man stood on wobbly legs and put his hand over Justin's through the glass. His mouth was level with his dick, and Justin knew he was going to come any time.</p><p>“If this glass didn’t exist, I would touch your body and impale you on my cock.”</p><p>Justin choked on a groan as the tip of his dick escaped over the elastic band of his briefs. The cold glass made him twitch.</p><p>“I’d suck your cock until you had no more cum in you.”</p><p>That did it. Justin pressed his whole body against the window, throwing his head back. The curtain fell on top of his head.</p><p>“Shit.” He pulled away, touching his flamed cheeks.</p><p>He’d never gotten so worked up before. He used some wet wipes to clean the jizz on the window, hoping Sap would never know what had happened.</p><p>Justin barely had his pants back on when the curtain rose. There had been no coin sounds, so he spun around wide-eyed.</p><p>Sap was in the chair, grinning cunningly.</p><p>“So, now you give them a real show?”</p><p>Justin stared at him, not sure what to say.</p><p>“Seems like you have a new one hooked on the <em>Justin Special</em>.”</p><p>“That’s good, right?” Justin finally found his voice.</p><p>“At his rate, the other boys might get bored.”</p><p>“So what if I have more regulars than the others? I’m <em>that</em> good.” Justin folded his arms across his chest, finding some confidence with Sap separated by a window from him. “I have a great ass, and I’m blond.”</p><p>“You’re getting sassy, Boy.” Sap scowled.</p><p>The curtain fell, enveloping Justin in the red light in his tiny room. He tugged the shirt on, sliding against a wall. His head fell on his knees and his fingers gripped his hair.</p><p>Not long afterward, the machine made him put a smile on his face and face the music.</p><p>Old Perv was a regular. The guy was in his sixties and looked like the biggest perv. After jacking off while watching Justin every Sunday night, he probably went home to his family, lying that he’d been out to grab cigarettes.</p><p>Justin had names for all his regulars. Some seemed like really nice guys, but Justin never spared much time watching them.</p><p>There was Tiny Dick every Monday. The guy had the smallest dick Justin had ever seen in his short life.</p><p>Tuesday’s special was Mr. Muscles, who opened his curtain at midnight without fail. There were too many muscles on the man for Justin’s taste, but he used workout music which seemed to turn Mr. Muscles on like nothing else.</p><p>Every other Wednesday, a shy man, always hiding his face under his hat, sat on the chair staring at Justin for half an hour. Shy Guy sometimes touched himself over his pants, but they never came off.</p><p>Thursdays and Fridays were the worst. Sap usually allowed some of his sleazy friends in. They didn’t need coins to keep Justin’s curtain open. They made him jack off in front of them. And there were many of them. By the time the last few guys stepped behind the glass window, Justin had no choice but to come dryly. They had no mercy on him or his body.</p><p>Justin feared the day Sap would allow his friends too close to him at the house parties. He’d seen the way they treated the other boys. He’d seen them drugging and fucking them in the sling while filming the whole thing. Sap kept Justin under his protective wing during the parties, but most of the time he stayed locked in his room.</p><p>Saturdays were busy usually. He had several regulars, which kept him dancing and touching himself for hours, but they weren’t such scumbags as Sap’s friends. If Justin shied away from trying something new, they accepted he wasn’t comfortable with it. Like eating his own cum, or sucking on his finger after having them up his ass for fifteen minutes.</p><p>The man that had made him shoot a load was back every night at ten without fail. Justin started calling him Dirty Secret in his mind. He never made the mistake to make him talk again or rub against the window.</p><p>Sap had stopped giving Justin shit, which worried him. Sap never just stopped doing something nasty, unless there was something worse coming.</p><p>Over a month had passed, though, since Dirty Secret had first appeared behind the glass.</p><p>Tonight he looked trashed, and Justin was surprised he’d been allowed inside. They had a policy against drunk or high clients.</p><p>While Justin scrolled through the playlist, the man talked, making his finger freeze over the song he wanted to play.</p><p>“Why do you do this?”</p><p>Justin slowly turned. No one had ever asked him that. No one had ever talked to him as if he were another human being.</p><p>“Why are you here?” Justin retorted.</p><p>“Ditto.”</p><p>“So, our song or something else?” Justin asked playfully. He had played <em>Private Dancer </em>several times during their time together, declaring it their song.</p><p>“I just wanna talk,” the man admitted.</p><p>“Sorry, the counselor hours are over.” Justin hit play on <em>Let’s Hear It From The Boy</em>, starting his dance.</p><p>“You can’t even be legal.”</p><p>Justin gritted his teeth, throwing his arms in the air, trying to let the music envelope him and take him away from the unwanted conversation.</p><p>“Let me save you.”</p><p>Justin laughed humorlessly, finally dropping his hands. “What about your wife?”</p><p>The man frowned, looking startled.</p><p>“I know your kind. You are tired of your life and want to try something new. You’re too afraid to pick someone up, so you get your rocks off here. It’s cool. To each his own.” Justin shrugged. “But don’t give me hope!” He spat, spinning on his heels.</p><p>“I gave up everything to be with my high-school sweetheart. Being married was something I never wanted. But I did it for him.”</p><p>Justin stiffened at the mention of a ‘<em>him</em>.’</p><p>“Yeah, you pegged me just about right. I’m married, but to a man.”</p><p>“Did you get tired of his ass and wanted to see a hot, young thing like me?” Justin asked slyly, turning to face his client.</p><p>“He cheated on me.”</p><p>Justin stared at him open-mouthed. Who in their right mind would cheat on a hot man like that? If this man was his, he’d worship the ground he walked on.</p><p>“Meet me for coffee after your shift ends.”</p><p>The curtain fell, shielding Justin's shocked face.</p><p>“Please.” He heard the man say before the door opened.</p><p>Justin wasn’t stupid enough to fall for some sob story, but something in the man’s voice made him believe he was telling the truth. He wouldn’t accept the invitation, however.</p><p>As Justin left his room a little after 3am, he was worried about the next time he saw Dirty Secret.</p><p>He left the <em>Boys Peep Show</em> with Ethan. He was Sap’s new boytoy.</p><p>Thankfully, there was no town car waiting around the corner with Dirty Secret begging for coffee and a shoulder to cry on. It sucked to be cheated on, Justin guessed.</p><p>At home, Sap was in the room Justin was now sharing with Ethan.</p><p>“The couch tonight, Ethan,” Sap told him.</p><p>Justin gulped, giving Ethan a small smile as the door closed behind his new friend.</p><p>“I’m tired, Sap,” Justin said, walking to his dresser.</p><p>“I’ve been too gentle with you, Blondie.” Sap grabbed Justin’s shoulder shoving him backwards.</p><p>Justin stumbled, not expecting such treatment. He fell hard on the floor. He grabbed his elbow, pain radiating from it.</p><p>“Aww. Did you get a boo-boo? Are you going to cry, Justin?”</p><p>“What do you want?”</p><p>“You know what I want.” Sap unbuckled his pants, walking closer.</p><p>Justin felt fear gripping his insides. Sap had spared him, but like Todd had warned him time and time again, Sap would break him sooner or later. It was better if he didn’t resist.</p><p>Justin scurried back on his elbows and soles, dragging his ass across the floor he and Ethan had scrubbed clean the other day. He stopped when he found the mattress.</p><p>“Please,” he begged.</p><p>“I know you’re eager for it.” Sap dropped his pants. He was going commando. He pulled off his shirt as he bent over Justin’s body. “I’ll be damned if one of those unsatisfied old bastards broke my favorite boy.”</p><p>“They can't touch me through the window,” Justin reasoned in a shaky voice.</p><p>His breathing came in pants as Sap divested him of his clothes.</p><p>“Come tomorrow you’re going to have your own private room.”</p><p>Justin was sure he was going to faint. “You promised me! You said nothing like that.”</p><p>“Shut up, you ungrateful slut!” Sap backhanded him over the face. Then he flipped him around.</p><p>Justin kept his face pressed into the pillow. He thought of the other boys’ advice regarding Sap fucking them. He had to endure it. Justin hoped they were right that he came fast.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“Where have you been?” Michael greeted Brian at the bottom of the stairs in the entryway of their house.</p><p>“Out.” Brian hung his coat up, heading to the kitchen. He needed another drink.</p><p>“Have you been drinking?” Michael demanded.</p><p>Brian poured a generous amount of Jim Beam in a glass before downing it in two gulps. He sucked on his lips at the sour taste.</p><p>“I’m talking to you! What the hell is wrong with you lately?”</p><p>Brian poured himself another glass. “You think I’m blind, Michael?”</p><p>His husband stared at him dumbly. “What kind of question is that?”</p><p>“You wanted <em>this</em>!” Brian waved his free hand around. It happened to be his left hand, brandishing the wedding band. “You wanted this freak show, this farce of marriage! I gave it to you! I gave up <em>everything</em> for you!”</p><p>Michael huffed. “You were going to become the Slut of Liberty Avenue if I hadn’t asked you to marry me!”</p><p>“You think you did your good deed to tie me to you so you could go behind my back to others?” Brian shouted. He emptied his glass, slamming it to the counter.</p><p>“What are you talking about? You’re drunk.”</p><p>“I know about how you got promoted at the store. I know about the chiropractor when you hurt your back. And I know about your new love tryst with the college professor.”</p><p>Michael paled, walking closer. He placed his hands on Brian's arms. “It’s…”</p><p>“You’re not even denying it,” Brian spat, pushing his husband away. “You ruined my fucking life, Mikey!”</p><p>“I did not!”</p><p>“Why?” Brian asked, breathing into Michael’s face.</p><p>“I love you,” he wailed, throwing his arms around Brian’s neck.</p><p>Brian pushed him away, not caring much when Michael fell in the middle of their kitchen. “It’s over, Michael.”</p><p>“I don’t know what’s wrong with me!” Michael scurried up, taking Brian's hand.</p><p>“I do,” Brian said softly, dropping his hand. “I’ve told you from the beginning. We’re men. We can’t be tied down to the same dick forever.”</p><p>“So, did you have someone on the side all along, too?” Michael asked with a hint of hope in his voice.</p><p>“I’m not a cheater, Mikey. I promised you monogamy.”</p><p>Michael looked dejected. “I always used protection.”</p><p>“Good thing I kept my golden rule to always use a rubber, huh?” Brian sneered.</p><p>“You claim you haven’t cheated or strayed. Then where have you been every night for the past couple of months?”</p><p>“That’s none of your business. All you have to know is that I never fucked anyone else.” Brian returned to the bottle of whiskey. “God knows how much I wanted to fuck other guys when we were at Babylon, but I knew we had made a promise to each other.”</p><p>Michael looked close to tears. “The competition I had at the Big Q? I don’t know why I did it. I really wanted the promotion.”</p><p>“So, you whored yourself for it.”</p><p>“And Dr. David… You try having a massage like he gave me without getting turned on. We never met outside his office.”</p><p>“You went to his appointments an awful lot. Ted had trouble with his back a while ago and he only needed three sessions. You had at least a dozen.” Brian took a gulp from the bottle. “That’s when I started thinking about it.”</p><p>“And… and now…” Michael sniffed. “I’m so sorry, Brian.” He threw himself at Brian again.</p><p>Instead of pushing him again, Brian wrapped his arms around his friend and husband.</p><p>“I’m a horrible person. I was so sure I was in love with you,” Michael confessed in Brian's shoulder. “But then I met Ben.”</p><p>“Your first customer at the comic book store I helped you open.”</p><p>Michael wailed some more, wetting Brian's shirt in his tears. “He invited me for coffee after the lecture at college.”</p><p>“You said yes,” Brian guessed, pressing his cheek against the side of Michael's head. A part deep inside of him wanted to hurt Michael, but a bigger part of him felt free. He wouldn’t be constricted by their farce of a marriage. He might lose his best friend, but freedom always came at a big price.</p><p>“Then he invited me to his place. He was cooking Chinese.”</p><p>“Did you tell him that you were married?”</p><p>“During dinner that night. He told me to leave.”</p><p>Brian pushed Michael at arm’s length, watching him curiously.</p><p>“I left, but then we bumped into each other on the street and it was karaoke night at Woody’s. I told him to come.”</p><p>Brian's eyes clouded. “The night everyone played Michael Jackson covers. The night you sang <em>Ben</em>.” Brian had been in the front row, as stunned as their friends had been to see Michael on stage singing. Then he’d run off right after the song ended. “You went after him.”</p><p>Michael averted his eyes. “You stood up and clapped the loudest, shouting that I was your man.”</p><p>“Oh, I’m sorry I put an end to your affair,” Brian said dryly.</p><p>“Ben came by the store the next day saying he couldn’t stop thinking about me.” Michael turned around. “I told him I’d leave you.”</p><p>Brian grabbed the back of Michael’s neck, shoving him into the wall. “You fucking hypocrite!”</p><p>“Brian!”</p><p>“What? Did you expect me to show you the door and wish you good luck with your new love?”</p><p>“I’m so sorry!” Michael started to turn, but Brian kept his head pressed against the wall. “Cut it out!”</p><p>“You’re scared? You think I’d hurt you?”</p><p>“I don’t know you anymore!”</p><p>“Well, that makes two of us, Mikey.” Brian walked toward the stairs. “Wait until we tell the girls. Did you even think about our children?” Brian didn’t wait around for Michael’s answer.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“Hey, Sugar! You look lost.”</p><p>Justin flinched from the drag queen peering down at him. He gripped the backpack close to his chest as he walked aimlessly down Liberty Avenue.</p><p>He had used every ounce of courage and power he had in his body to escape Sap. When Sap had touched his ass, Justin had flipped on his back then kicked him in the groin. While Sap had cursed up a storm, cupping his junk, Justin had gotten dressed. When Sap had charged at him, Justin punched him in the mouth, pushing him into the dresser.</p><p>Sap had fallen, hitting his head to the floor. When he didn’t move, Justin knew it was his chance. He packed some clothes and all his savings before hightailing it from that place.</p><p>It had been three days since his escape. He had expected Sap to look for him, but he’d probably already replaced him.</p><p>Justin finally summoned up enough courage to go inside the diner. Judging by the carols and decorations, it was close to Christmas time. He huddled into the back booth.</p><p>“Where’s your sidekick?” Debbie approached with a cup of hot chocolate.</p><p>“Who knows?” Justin mumbled, keeping his head down.</p><p>Debbie reached down, tilting his head. “That bruise on your cheek must hurt.”</p><p>Justin flinched away, closing his eyes. Sap’s work of art was still on his skin.</p><p>The doorbell jiggling announced the entrance of another late-night customer.</p><p>“I’ll be right back. Burger and fries,” she hollered to the cook. “On the house, Sunshine,” she added with a wink.</p><p>Justin hunkered down in the booth. He felt safe in the diner.</p><p>“What are you doing here at this hour?” Debbie demanded loudly, grabbing Justin's attention.</p><p>He sucked in a breath. It was Dirty Secret, and he looked like he’d seen better days.</p><p>“Have you been doing drugs?” Debbie asked, checking his eyes.</p><p>Dirty Secret wrenched away. “Fuck off.”</p><p>“Ouch. That’s no way to talk to me, kiddo.”</p><p>“Shit. Sorry, Deb.” The man’s shoulders slumped. “I couldn’t have this talk with you sober.”</p><p>“Is Michael alright?” Her hands went to her heart.</p><p>Justin sipped from his warm drink, having a feeling he already knew what was going on. Debbie was Dirty Secret’s mother-in-law. Her son was the cheating asshole who’d driven Dirty Secret to come to the <em>Boys Peep Show</em>.</p><p>“There’s no easy way to say it,” Dirty Secret said sadly. “Mikey and I are getting a divorce.”</p><p>“What?” She cried out. “What happened?”</p><p>“What do you think?” He asked dryly.</p><p>“So, we were right. You were stepping out on him.”</p><p>Dirty Secret laughed humorlessly. “<em>Of course</em>. I’m sure the boys had bets about me fucking someone else. Well, guess what, Deb? You were all wrong! Saint Mikey fucked around behind MY back.”</p><p>Debbie stood up tall, pointing a finger at Dirty Secret. “No! You’re wrong.”</p><p>“The first step is denial. I’ve been through that.”</p><p>“How long?” She asked, fearfully.</p><p>“Years! Since he worked at the Big Q. And now he’s met that college professor. The one he’s been yapping about constantly. Guess they fell in love.” He shrugged again.</p><p>“Oh, kiddo!” Debbie rounded the counter and had Dirty Secret in a tight hug.</p><p>The bell announcing the food was ready pulled them apart. When Debbie placed the food in front of Justin, he noticed Dirty Secret staring at him.</p><p>“<em>You</em>!”</p><p>Justin pressed his back against the booth, suddenly afraid. It was the first time he had met one of his clients outside the peep show. The way Dirty Secret was advancing toward him made him want to bolt out, though the door was on the other side of the room.</p><p>“Hi,” Justin squeaked.</p><p>“You know Sunshine?” Debbie asked curiously. Her eyes narrowed. “How? I thought you just said you never cheated on Michael!”</p><p>“Looking doesn’t count as cheating, right? I’ve been watching him for a while.”</p><p>“Does Michael know?”</p><p>“Bring me a coffee, and hold the remarks.”</p><p>Justin tried to settle his breathing when Dirty Secret sat across from him, offering him a smile. “I’m Brian.”</p><p>“Justin,” he mumbled.</p><p>“I’ve been searching for you. They told me you quit.”</p><p>“Yeah, uh…” Justin rubbed the back of his neck. “Cash is better on the streets,” he explained calmly.</p><p>“Someone hurt you.” Brian kept his eyes on his bruised cheek.</p><p>“It will heal.” He had worse bruises from Sap. Concealer was his best friend after Sap’s abusive kicks.</p><p>Debbie brought Brian's coffee. She left their booth, but from her spot at the cook’s window, she could still eavesdrop.</p><p>“I bet you heard my conversation,” Brian started saying.</p><p>“I didn't mean to,” Justin said hurriedly.</p><p>“It shows I didn’t lie to you. So, it looks like we’re having coffee after all.” A smile tugged at his lips.</p><p>“Your wish coming true.” Justin relaxed enough to pick at his fries. “I’m sorry.”</p><p>Brian lifted a brow.</p><p>“For your marriage. It must suck.”</p><p>“Life sucks in general.” Brian leaned his elbows on the table. “Listen. The reason I kept returning to you was more than lust over your body. You intrigued me. I wanted to know why you ended up there. Why are you on the streets now? I want to protect you.”</p><p>Justin choked on his bite of burger. “You want me to be your kept boy?”</p><p>“If you want to label it that way.”</p><p>“I don’t even know you,” Justin said softly. The promise of a safe life lured him to accept whatever offer Brian had.</p><p>“I’m sure you don’t have anywhere to be, and well, for me… anywhere is better than home at the moment.” Brian leaned back in his booth. He started talking about his life, his job, the family he and Michael had, the children they had with their lesbian friends.</p><p>Justin listened to the whole story in rapt attention.</p><p>“So, I work in an advertising company. I own the business. It’s good money. Since I opened it a few years ago, I’ve been spending more time there than at home. I won’t be some narrow-minded fag blaming myself for my husband’s extracurricular activities, because he’s been doing it long before I opened Kinnetik.</p><p>“You see, Mikey and I have been best friends since high school. During college I got a taste of what my life could have been. I used to stay out all night and fuck my way through anyone who was willing at Babylon. But then Mikey somehow convinced me that we were meant to be together. We got married. I’d like to say we were pretty happy. It’s true I missed tricking, but I figured this was what everyone should do: settle down with a special someone. I can’t tell you if I really ever loved Michael. I love him as my best friend, but not the way I should. It seems he didn’t love me the same way, either. Now he’s fallen for that professor.</p><p>“Some years ago, a lesbian friend of ours convinced us to have babies with her and her partner. I was the first to donate my sperm. Then a couple years later, Michael followed. I have no idea what we’re going to tell them. Lindsay will probably try to sign us up for couple’s therapy or some other type of shit. Mel would say she knew we were doomed, and she won’t be wrong. I’ve always believed that fags can’t be chained to the same ass forever.”</p><p>Then Brian told him about his deepest desires – to be able to fuck anyone, to have fun, to not be chained.</p><p>In turn, Justin spoke for the first time since he’d been kicked out of his childhood home about his life there. He told Brian how his parents had discovered his porn stash and his drawings of men, how they threw him out into the street. He talked about Sap and his time spent with him, ending up with the terrible memory of his last time around Sap.</p><p>“That bastard!” Brian exclaimed, making Justin jump. “Did he…?”</p><p>“No. I escaped before he could fuck me.” They kept looking into each other's eyes until Justin broke the spell. “Yes,” he whispered.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Yes, to your offer. If it still stands.”</p><p>Brian beamed. “I bought a loft I planned on using while the divorce is being processed. Allow me to take you there.”</p><p>Justin blinked his tears. “Thank you.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Brian avoided Debbie’s judging eyes as he placed a twenty on the table he and Justin had vacated. He led the boy outside with a hand on the small of his back.</p><p>The Jeep was parked in the side alley. Justin stiffened when Brian steered him that way.</p><p>“I parked over there.” He pointed toward the black Jeep.</p><p>Justin chewed on his lips, scurrying along, hugging the backpack to his chest. It broke Brian's heart to see such a young boy with so much weight on his shoulders.</p><p>And he was the prettiest thing Brian had seen in a long while. It would be a lie if he said he didn’t want to fuck the boy. But he’d have to tread carefully. Everything the boy had told him pointed to the fact that he was still a virgin despite the harsh life he’d had.</p><p>During the ride to his new place, Brian turned on the radio, upping the volume so Justin wouldn’t think small talk was necessary.</p><p>“Heh.” Justin chuckled. “It’s our song.”</p><p>Brian shot him a curious look, focusing on the song. <em>Private Dancer</em> – the song Justin loved playing during their meetings.</p><p>“I’d love to see you dance without a glass separating us.”</p><p>Justin shrugged. “It’s not a deal breaker. I love dancing.”</p><p>Brian laughed. The kid had spunk. It also piqued his curiosity about the boy’s age again. Justin had avoided mentioning how old he was. It wasn’t like Brian had focused on that part, but he was afraid he’d scare Justin away if he were to discover that a thirty-year-old guy was interested in him.</p><p>At the apartment building, Brian led Justin to the elevator, then through the door leading to his new safe haven. Michael had no idea he’d bought the place.</p><p>“Shut the door,” Brian said over his shoulder, dropping his jacket on the couch.</p><p>The metal door was slammed shut, the banging noise echoing in the sparsely-decorated open space. Justin was standing by the door, looking lost.</p><p>“Bed is that way. Well, it’s just a mattress for now.” Brian waved to the three steps leading toward a divided, elevated panel and enclosed sanctuary. That bedroom had sold him on the loft.</p><p>Justin still didn’t move, and he was visibly shaking.</p><p>“Hey,” Brian said gently, walking to him. “I promise not to do anything you aren’t ready to do.”</p><p>Justin’s terrified blue eyes met his. “I think this is a mistake.”</p><p>Brian blocked the way to the door with a hand on the handle. He was inches away from Justin's face.</p><p>“Why did you accept my invitation?”</p><p>Justin breathed heavily through his panic attack. “I don’t know. I thought I’d feel safe here.”</p><p>“You <em>are</em> safe here,” Brian insisted. “I’m sorry you’ve been around assholes most of your life, but I promise I didn’t bring you here for sex. I mean, if you’re into that I won’t say no.”</p><p>Justin jutted his chin out. “You’re hot.”</p><p>“Oh, no, you don’t!” Brian pushed him against the door. “You don’t use that bravado on me. I know you’re scared to be here, but listen to me. There’s nothing to be afraid of. I won’t touch you if it is not okay with you.”</p><p>“But you must want something in return. I can suck you off.”</p><p>Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. As much as he’d like to have Justin's plump lips wrapped around his cock, it wasn’t the time.</p><p>“What if I told you that I want my kept boy to be safe? And just that?”</p><p>“So you don’t want any sexual favors in return? Do you just want me to stand here and look pretty? Give you private dances? Maybe we could use that pole over there for spicing up the dance.” Justin was regaining some confidence. “Should I scrub your floors on my knees? Lick your windows clean?”</p><p>“Is that how that asshole treated you?” Brian could feel anger boiling in his blood.</p><p>“I don’t understand what you want from me,” Justin whispered, looking at the floor.</p><p>“For now? All I want is for you to feel safe here. Trust me.”</p><p>Justin took a shaky breath and advanced further than the door. He was in the bedroom when Brian opened one of the panels dividing it from the living area.</p><p>“And one more thing. How old are you?”</p><p>“Why does it matter?” Justin dumped his backpack on the floor.</p><p>“Because there are rules in my home. One of them is honesty. I was honest enough with you up until now. Right?”</p><p>Justin wrapped his arms around himself. “I’m legal.”</p><p>“Somehow, I doubt it.”</p><p>“What day is it?” Justin asked.</p><p>Brian pulled out his phone. “One hour into December 17<sup>th</sup>.”</p><p>Justin smiled brilliantly and in that moment Brian understood why Debbie had called him Sunshine earlier.</p><p>“I’m legal,” he said confidently. “I’ve been eighteen for a whole hour now.”</p><p>Brian stepped closer, happy to see Justin didn’t flinch or shy away. He took the boy in his arms, enjoying the way he felt.</p><p>“Happy birthday, Justin.”</p><p>Justin’s eyes burst with tears. “This is the best present anyone has ever given me.”</p><p>“I don’t have anything for you,” Brian said, confused.</p><p>“You’re giving me a roof above my head and safety. Thank you.” He tilted his head back to stare at Brian. “You sure about the blowjob?”</p><p>“Do you want to do it, or do you think you have to do it?” Brian challenged.</p><p>“I’ve wanted you since the moment I first saw you. I never wanted any of my clients, but you… I have no idea… there was something about you.”</p><p>“Only if you want it,” Brian said gently.</p><p>“I think you’re afraid.” Justin pushed Brian on the bed. “When’s the last time someone other than your husband sucked you off?”</p><p>“Seven years, since we got married.” Brian refrained from explaining how Michael was a lousy lover and how seldom he’d gone down on Brian. Michael had always preferred to lie under Brian. Their sex life was dull if he thought about it. There was missionary and doggy style, and on some extremely rare occasion shower sex. Whenever Brian had tried to initiate anything intimate outside the bedroom, Michael had freaked out, pointing out that they ate at the kitchen table, their friends sat on that couch when they visited, and the list went on and on. Brian tried not to think of the times he’d tried convincing Michael to visit the backroom at Babylon. But that had been in their first year of marriage when he was still adapting to his new Stepford husband status.</p><p>“Do you have some music?” Justin sat up on his knees between Brian's legs.</p><p>“Any preference?” Brian asked as he stood up, walking to his stereo.</p><p>“Something hot.”</p><p>While Brian browsed through his music, he tried to figure out what sort of person Justin was. He didn’t appear to be a simple, scared boy. He felt safe enough with Brian that he’d relaxed enough to be himself. That was a big accomplishment.</p><p>After hitting play on the first thing that sounded remotely like sex, Brian returned to Justin. The boy was standing by the bed in only his white undies.</p><p>Brian figured he would join the nakedness.</p><p>“Uh, huh!” Justin shook a finger, reached for Brian's waist. “George Michael? That’s so corny.”</p><p>Brian rolled his eyes. He leaned so close they breathed the same air. “I want your sex.”</p><p>Justin pulled his bottom lip between his teeth. “I want it all with you,” he admitted quietly. “Just take it slow.”</p><p>“Anything you want.”</p><p>Justin focused on unbuttoning Brian's jeans and pulling them down his legs. His boxers joined them at his ankles. Justin helped him out of his shoes and then threw away the rest of his clothes. Brian pulled his shirt over his head, dumping it near the mattress.</p><p>“Sit. Relax.” Justin pushed Brian down until he was lying on his back. “Good.” He licked at Brian's nipples until Brian cursed loudly. He couldn’t remember the last time his nipples had been so sensitive, and the sensation nearly brought him to the brink of orgasm.</p><p>Justin moved lower, licking a trail down to his belly button and sticking his tongue in there.</p><p>Brian seized up, shouting in pleasure. <em>What is this twink doing to him?</em></p><p>Justin smirked against his skin as he peppered kisses on Brian's hipbone. Then he sat on his hunches, admiring the glory of Brian's dick.</p><p>“Are you going to suck me or stare at my dick?”</p><p>“Shh. I need a minute. Such a glorious cock has to be appreciated from every angle. What are you, like, nine inches long?”</p><p>“About…”</p><p>Justin’s eyes darkened with pleasure. He took the base of Brian’s dick in his right hand, lowering his head. He took a big gulp of air before swallowing him whole.</p><p>Brian sat up on his elbows to stare at Justin's blond hair. His lips were honest-to-God pressed to his sac. No one who’d blown him in the past had been able to take his entire length.</p><p>Then Justin did the oldest trick in the book. He swallowed.</p><p>Brian gripped the bedsheet in his hands, throwing his head back. He could feel the back of Justin's throat. His mouth was so hot and wet.</p><p>Justin sucked his way up to the tip where he licked at it for a while before taking him back in his mouth.</p><p>Brian was going to die. The fire in his stomach had never felt so intense. Breathing became difficult. He could feel his heart beating faster as he got closer to the most intense orgasm he’d ever had.</p><p>Justin repeated his little routine: suck, lick, swallow, until Brian grabbed two fistfuls of blond hair, keeping his head in place. He thrust in short moves, keeping his eyes on Justin's wet eyes. He trusted the kid to tell him when he couldn’t breathe. A spark of mischief appeared in the blue eyes, and Justin used the tiniest hint of teeth on his way back to the tip. Brian rammed his dick back in Justin's throat, covering his surprised sound. Then Justin swallowed around him.</p><p>Brian stared mesmerized at the way Justin's throat bulged with his dick. When he pressed a shaky hand over Justin’s throat, Justin moaned loudly.</p><p>That did it.</p><p>Before Brian could warn him, he erupted down Justin's throat, no hint of cum touching the boy’s mouth. When he felt the boy’s throat closing in, he pulled out before he could gag.</p><p>Justin wiped at his tears, smiling brightly. “Good?” His voice was rough and raw.</p><p>Brian grabbed his upper arms, throwing him over the mattress, then covering his body with him. He descended for their first kiss, which made him realize that everything about this thing with Justin was backwards.</p><p>As they kissed, he became aware of the song. It was the third part of <em>I Want Your Sex: A Last Request</em>.</p><p>
  <em>You know<br/>
That I remain a gentleman<br/>
But even so<br/>
There's only so much<br/>
A gentleman can stand<br/>
Sleep with me<br/>
Oh, sleep with me tonight</em>
</p><p>Justin touched Brian's cheek, staring into his eyes. He didn’t have to say it, his wish was clear.</p><p>Before either of them could change their minds, Brian dived for his jeans, taking his wallet out.</p><p>“Why do you have a condom?”</p><p>“Always be careful. Never fuck without one,” Brian told him seriously.</p><p>“But I thought you were married.”</p><p>“So? I never did it raw. Never will.”</p><p>“Never?” Justin’s eyes slid between them.</p><p>“No. Your life is at stake if you do it,” Brian insisted. “This is lube. I hope it’s not cold.” He placed another foil next to them on the mattress.</p><p>“Do it,” Justin breathed. He lifted his ass, allowing Brian to take his undies off.</p><p>Brian took his time prepping Justin. He kept his eyes on the boy’s face, drinking in every new emotion playing there as he opened him up with his fingers.</p><p>He was so tight. Brian never had a virgin before. He and Michael had both fucked other men, Brian more than one, before they’d gotten married.</p><p>“I think I’m ready,” Justin said in a voice filled with desire. “Let me.”</p><p>As he rolled the condom on Brian's dick, he caught his lips in a deep kiss. <em>One More Try</em> started playing, which made them smile. This was Justin’s new shot at a normal life.</p><p>Brian lifted one of Justin's legs, shifting closer. “Ready?”</p><p>“Go slow,” Justin whispered, scrunching his eyes shut.</p><p>“It will always hurt. It’s part of the game,” Brian explained. “I’ll try not to hurt you.”</p><p>Justin nodded jerkily, hooking his arms around Brian's neck. “Just stick it inside me.”</p><p>Brian guided his dick to Justin's ass, slowly pushing in. He waited until Justin relaxed enough so the experience wouldn’t be any more painful that it should be. Then he slid in until he was balls deep.</p><p>Justin let out a gush of breath. “So full.”</p><p>Brian grinned. He started pumping steadily, and soon Justin was meeting his thrusts, moaning loudly.</p><p>Brian usually hated when Michael was vocal during sex, but he came to realize that it was his annoying voice that upset him. He loved hearing the sounds he could extract from Justin. His new neighbors would have to get used to it.</p><p>Brian kept the pace slow, knowing there would be other times for hurried fucks. He wanted Justin's first time to be special.</p><p>He pressed his lips to Justin's ear. “Happy birthday, Justin.”</p><p>Justin's response was to throw his head back and cry out Brian's name as he found completion. His ass constricted Brian's dick, triggering his release.</p><p>Brian fell on top of Justin before rolling onto his side. He turned his head to see Justin staring at him with shiny eyes.</p><p>“I don’t want to sleep,” he murmured, seeking Brian's hand. “I’m afraid that in the morning this will have been a wonderful dream and I’ll wake up on a bench in the park.”</p><p>“No sleeping yet. We have to clean up.” Brian pulled him up, leading the way to the bathroom. “And Justin? This isn’t a dream.”</p><p>Justin beamed. “When can we do it again?”</p><p>Brian barked out a loud laugh. “I’ve created a monster.”</p><p>“A sex monster,” Justin joked, wrapping his arms around Brian.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>The following morning, Brian was brewing coffee. Thankfully, the loft had come furnished with the necessities.</p><p>Justin was sprawled all over the mattress, snoring lightly.</p><p>Brian's phone rang from the nightstand. It was Michael’s ringtone, and a part of Brian felt like an ass for not letting him know he wasn’t coming home. Knowing Michael, he’d been up half the night, creating morbid scenarios.</p><p>“I’m still alive; keep your panties on,” Brian answered in a hushed voice.</p><p>Justin merely grumbled, rolling onto his stomach. One of his legs fell to the floor. Brian dragged his feet away from the danger zone. Justin's ass was on display and Brian was sure the kid was tired.</p><p>“Why wouldn’t you be?” Michael asked, worried. “Did something happen?”</p><p>Brian dumped a generous amount of sugar in the carafe of coffee, swirling around the liquid. “You’re not even home.”</p><p>There was a loud pause. “You’re not home, either!”</p><p>Brian snorted. “Here I thought you stayed up waiting for me, but I guess the joke is on me.”</p><p>“Did something happen? Did you get arrested or something?”</p><p>“It’s none of your business. You’re with him?” Brian tried to keep the tone jovial.</p><p>“When you left, I couldn’t be there anymore. I came to Ben’s. Where did you go?”</p><p>“Babylon. The diner.” Brian left out the part where he’d searched for Justin for three hours after visiting the <em>Boys Peep Show</em> again. Then he’d gotten drunk at Babylon and went to the diner. “I told your mother.”</p><p>“Why would you do something like that?” Michael screeched.</p><p>“She had a right to know.”</p><p>“I would have told her. She’s <em>my</em> mother, Brian!”</p><p>“Well, you can have your moment of glory when we tell the girls. I was thinking this evening.”</p><p>“Can’t today,” Michael mumbled.</p><p>“Oh, you got big plans to please your professor?” Brian rolled his eyes, slumping onto the sofa as he drank from the carafe.</p><p>“If you must know, it’s Ben’s birthday.”</p><p>Brian choked on his gulp of coffee. The world was an unjust place. Then he started laughing loudly.</p><p>How fucking fucked up. Both Mikey’s new tryst and Brian’s kept boy shared the same birthday.</p><p>“What the fuck is so funny?” Michael demanded.</p><p>“Can you make less noise? I’m trying to sleeeeep!” Justin protested from the bedroom.</p><p>“Who’s that,” Michael asked quickly. “Did you go home with someone? Is that the new low—”</p><p>“You better watch what you say, Michael,” Brian spat. “What I do is none of your fucking business. Not anymore. You don’t get to act like a jealous queen over the blond boy ass I fucked last night! You have your own Captain Astro there, waiting for you.”</p><p>“Brian, it’s not like that!”</p><p>“Why did you call?” Brian sighed, drinking some more from the carafe.</p><p>“I wanted to tell you not to call me today. I’ll be busy – Ben’s birthday.”</p><p>“Don’t worry, <em>sweetheart</em>. I’ll never call you again!” Brian ended the phone call, resisting the urge to smash the phone to the floor.</p><p>“What was that all about?” Justin’s sleepy voice came from behind him.</p><p>Brian turned to find Justin wrapped in the dark-blue bed sheet, looking thoroughly ravishing. “I’d ask if you were up for one more, but your ass is not used to this much attention.”</p><p>Justin smiled gently, cuddling into Brian's side. “Was that your husband?”</p><p>“Apparently, you share the birthday with his new lover. How fucking poetic.”</p><p>Justin chewed on his lower lip. “There’s something I wanted to ask last night, but you got me distracted.”</p><p>“Is that so?”</p><p>“What are the terms of this arrangement?”</p><p>“I thought we were clear that I don’t expect anything from you. I hope you gave up your ass because you wanted to.”</p><p>“Totally. I told you. I’ve been attracted to you since I first saw you.”</p><p>“This can be anything you want. I’m a free man. But I’m warning you.” Brian pulled away, standing up. “I plan to sample all the flavors the backroom of Babylon has to offer.”</p><p>Justin flinched. “If you want me to accompany you there, I won’t. It’s my hard limit.” He brought his knees up, wrapping his arms around them, the bed sheet covering his glorious body. “Sap owns Babylon.”</p><p>“The same Sap….”</p><p>Justin nodded. “You probably know him as Gary Sapperstein. His close friends call him Sap.”</p><p>“Of course I know the motherfucker! I’ve been a regular at Babylon since I was your age.”</p><p>“How old <em>are </em>you?” Justin mumbled, staring unseeingly out the window. “I promise it won’t matter, but I’m curious.”</p><p>“Thirty,” Brian admitted.</p><p>Justin shot him an amazed look. “I wasn’t too far off, then. I figured you were around thirty...three?”</p><p>“Take that back!” Brian grabbed Justin's side, his fingers digging into his ribs.</p><p>Justin squirmed around, tears leaking out of his eyes.</p><p>“My age is a hard limit,” Brian said after several minutes.</p><p>“I figured that out on my own.” Justin gasped out for air. “Hey, does this place have a laundry room downstairs or something?”</p><p>Brian draped an arm around Justin's shoulders. “No offense or anything, but I’d rather buy you new clothes. You can trash the ones you have.”</p><p>“Maybe I like my own clothes?”</p><p>“Anyway, since Michael will be out of the house, I plan to pack my shit and take it with me. Think you can help me?”</p><p>Justin stared at him for a long minute. “Sure!”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>The drive to Brian's house felt like it lasted a lifetime, but Justin started doubting his presence there.</p><p>It scared him how much he trusted Brian. He hadn’t expected the previous night to end with him no longer a virgin. He’d planned to blow Brian, then sleep on the couch. But after their first time on the mattress, then the shower, they had returned to Brian’s bed. Brian had woken him up during the night for more, and Justin had timidly initiated their last round when the first rays of sunlight flooded the room.</p><p>“Come on.” Brian pulled him out of his thoughts.</p><p>They were stopped in the driveway of a suburban house. It looked like a nice neighborhood. It reminded him of home. He used to live in suburbia, but his house was on the other side of town.</p><p>Brian unlocked the door, throwing his keys on the small table nearby. It was a familiar gesture from what Justin could see. He closed the door in his wake, taking in the hallway and the stairs.</p><p>He followed Brian up the stairs, trying hard not to linger too long, but he was curious.</p><p>Brian opened the bedroom door. “In there. Just wait a sec.”</p><p>Justin stepped into the bedroom and could tell that it felt like home. He almost felt sorry for Brian's marriage falling apart.</p><p>The white furniture was right out of some high-class ‘home-and-living’ magazine. The sheets on the bed looked expensive as fuck.</p><p>But Justin's attention quickly veered toward the pictures lying on the dresser. He finally could put a face to the cheater. Michael was just some ordinary guy who didn’t deserve Brian. It wasn’t like Justin thought he deserved him any more, but if Brian gave him the time of day, Justin wasn’t going to fuck up and hurt Brian.</p><p>They looked so happy in the pictures, in love even. In some pictures they were merely hugging, in others they were kissing. There were photos of their children and what looked like their mothers. There was another one – a group photo. He recognized the tall guy in the pink shirt.</p><p>“Who’s this guy?” Justin asked, pointing at the picture when Brian returned with two suitcases and several suit bags.</p><p>Brian spared the photo a look. “Those are our friends. The mousy-looking one is Ted. The other one is Emmett.”</p><p>“I know him – Emmett.”</p><p>Brian spun from where he’d opened the closet’s doors. “Why… I had no idea Honeycutt frequented such shady places.”</p><p>“It was at the beginning of the year. Sap had me working on one of the platforms at Babylon when he was short of go-go boys due to flu season. I was an angel.”</p><p>“Did Emmett rearrange your crooked tiara?”</p><p>Justin turned around, placing the photo back on the dresser. “Sap had me snorting coke all night to keep me awake and able to dance. After two nights of that, my body decided it was too much. I fainted.”</p><p>“Holy shit!”</p><p>“So I woke up in the bathroom with Emmett holding my head on his lap and wetting my lips with water. We didn’t get a chance to introduce ourselves. Sap retrieved me, taking me back home and berating me for embarrassing him.”</p><p>“What a piece of shit!”</p><p>“Forget it. It’s over now,” Justin reminded him quietly. He joined him in front of the large closet. “Which ones are yours?”</p><p>Brian gave him a scandalized look. “All of them!”</p><p>“You share clothes?” Justin didn’t even attempt to hide his repulse.</p><p>“His clothes are in that dresser.” Brian pointed behind them.</p><p>“Wait. You want to put all these in those bags?”</p><p>“We’ll make more than one trip.”</p><p>“Bring over some trash bags.”</p><p>“I’m not throwing my clothes away, Justin!”</p><p>“We place them in there. They’ll stay in those bags safer than in the suitcase, like with your suits in those special bags.”</p><p>“Good-looking <em>and</em> smart. I caught the Catch of the Year.” Brian pecked Justin's lips.</p><p>It took them hours to have everything packed. In the suitcases went Brian's impressive perfume collection and his creams. He had a box of sex toys, which he took, saying Michael rarely allowed him to use them, so he wouldn’t need them.</p><p>Brian also packed the picture of him and his son on top of his perfume boxes.</p><p>That was when his phone rang, making him curse.</p><p>“Lindsay, now is not a good time.” He went to the window, peering outside. “I have to go to a meeting. Mikey’s not home. Ask Deb.” Brian pulled the phone away from his ear, and Justin could hear the shrill voice of a woman shouting. “Yeah, Father of the Year trophy goes to Brian...not!”</p><p>Justin figured Brian was on the phone with his son’s mother. </p><p>“I told you that I can’t! No, you can’t just come over and drop him…  Fuck!” Brian spat throwing his phone on the bed. “Stay here.”</p><p>Justin was left standing in the middle of the room, feeling like a dirty secret himself. He most likely was. How was Brian going to explain his presence there if his friend discovered him?</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Lindsay had always managed to have simply perfect timing.</p><p>She had burst into his office with the good news that he’d become a father while Brian was holding a second meeting with one of his biggest accounts.</p><p>She had interrupted his and Michael’s fifth-year anniversary with the news that she was giving birth. Brian had to literally pull out of Michael and stuff his hard dick in his jeans, only to wait hours for the baby to be delivered.</p><p>And now, dropping his son off was the last thing he needed.</p><p>It wasn’t that he didn’t love Gus. He’d been there through the most important parts of his life, but even though the girls lived down the street, Brian had refused to become a true Stepford husband and walk the baby in the stroller up and down the street. Michael was the one who had succumbed to their doe eyes and begging.</p><p>Brian wrenched the front door open. He picked his three-year-old kid up. “What’s all this?” He eyed the bag at her feet.</p><p>“Gus misses you. Mel and I thought it’d be a good idea to let him spend some time with you, then you can have JR over.”</p><p>“Are you out of your mind?” Brian whisper-shouted.</p><p>“What’s wrong with having your son over? You haven’t visited since his birthday. Is everything okay between you two? Michael mentioned that you’ve been acting funny.”</p><p>Brian was glad he was holding his son, or he’d have told Lindsay what a piece of shit Michael was.</p><p>The top stair creaked in a way that Brian knew too well. For whatever unfathomable reason, Justin had broken his promise and was coming down the stairs.</p><p>“You said Michael isn’t home,” Lindsay said slowly. Her eyes widened comically when Justin appeared in her line of view. She opened her mouth, but nothing came out.</p><p>Justin’s face was bright red and he looked like he'd rather jump in front of a moving train than be there. “Your phone kept ringing. It read ‘Michael.’ I’m sorry.”</p><p>Lindsay snatched Gus from his arms, hugging him tightly. “Who is <em>this</em>? What have you done?”</p><p>Brian palmed his face. “For fuck’s sake, it’s clearly more complicated than you think. I told you I was busy.”</p><p>“Busy cheating on poor Michael!” She accused him, keeping a hand over Gus’s ear while his other ear was pressed to her shoulder.</p><p>“Don’t be so hasty to call him a saint. He drove me to do this. But how about we both tell you in a few days?” Brian stared at her pleadingly. His eyes narrowed when his phone rang again in Justin's hand. He snatched it, accepting the call.</p><p>“What the fuck do you want now?” Brian barked into the phone, watching sadly as his friend turned on her heels and rushed out the door with his child in her arms. “Why aren’t you celebrating with your new beau?”</p><p>“Ma called.”</p><p>“Do you want me to hold your hand while she rips you a new one?”</p><p>“She fucking hates me, Brian! It’s your fault.”</p><p>“Excuse me? You’re the one who fucked behind my back! Did you expect her to embrace you and accept that you’re an idiot?”</p><p>“Wait till I get home. We need to talk.”</p><p>“Don’t hold your breath on that. Besides, Lindsay knows. She was just over trying to leave Gus with us for a few days. Guess there’s no ‘us’ anymore.”</p><p>“You told Lindsay, too? Why don’t you advertise it in the paper?”</p><p>“Might as well. That way I’ll get all the men in gay PA to come to my door to make me feel better.”</p><p>“That’s a new low you’re hitting.”</p><p>“You’ve hit rock bottom, Mikey. With a resounding sound. It will be a while before you get up.” Brian hung up, fuming. “Let’s get out of here before I murder someone.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Brian’s therapy to cope with the new problems in his life was shopping. Justin found that out after they left Brian's old house.</p><p>They hit the fanciest stores in town.</p><p>First, Brian bought Justin more clothes than he had in his life, then they went furniture shopping. Apparently the stuff in the loft wasn’t up to Brian's standards.</p><p>It was late in the evening when they returned to the loft. The new purchases would be delivered in the next few days.</p><p>Justin made a bee-line to what would be their former couch, slumping on it. “I can’t feel my legs.”</p><p>“Stop being a drama princess,” Brian commented. He was banging drawers in the kitchen, then he came to Justin's side, throwing a handful of fliers at him. “Choose whatever. I want Number Ten from the Thai menu. Here’s my phone.”</p><p>“Where are you going?” Justin asked, worried when Brian went to the door.</p><p>“To grab the other bags from the car, <em>dear</em>. Youth these days,” he muttered, disappearing through the metal door.</p><p>Justin looked through the take-out menus. He was famished and everything looked good, but the prices were ridiculous. He reminded himself that he was Brian's kept boy and he wouldn’t have to worry about the cost, although he didn’t like his new status.</p><p>Judging by what he’d learned about Brian, he was a decent person and wouldn’t hurt him in any way. He trusted that Brian wanted to help him, so Justin planned on asking Brian to help him finish high school. He wanted to become independent and find his way in life.</p><p>He settled on Number Seven from the Thai menu, deciding Brian wouldn’t have to deal with the delivery costs from two different restaurants that way. He also chose some fortune cookies. Before he could worry that he didn’t know the address, he found it stapled to the Italian menu.</p><p>It also made Justin wonder how long Brian had been living in the loft.</p><p>He was hanging up with the restaurant when Brian returned with the garbage bags holding his clothes.</p><p>“Move your ass and help me with the rest,” he barked, going to dump them on the mattress.</p><p>It took them two more trips to get everything.</p><p>While Brian started sorting through his clothes, Justin hovered by the panels. He had no idea how to broach the subject of what he wanted to ask Brian.</p><p>“What? You’re annoying as fuck.”</p><p>Justin shuffled toward the kitchen area. He filled a glass with tap water, glaring into it. He hated the tears gathered in his eyes. He should be used to being treated that way.</p><p>“For fuck’s sake! Tell me you’re not crying,” Brian said from the other side of the island counter.</p><p>Justin hastily wiped his eyes, shaking his head. “I’m not some silly little faggot.”</p><p>“Of course you’re not.” Brian walked closer, wrapping his arms around him. “You’re pretty strong.”</p><p>“I am?” Justin sniffed, looking up into Brian's hazel eyes.</p><p>“Yes. You survived hell at such a young age.”</p><p>Justin blinked back tears, moved by the care in Brian's voice. He was a perfect stranger – a stranger who cared enough to save him.</p><p>“Now, what did you want earlier?”</p><p>“It was stupid,” Justin mumbled, pulling away.</p><p>“Tell me,” Brian demanded, grabbing his elbow.</p><p>“I want to finish high school. Maybe go to college? This is not me. I don’t like being...kept.”</p><p>Brian smiled indulgently, as if he’d expected it. “Give me some time to sort out my life. I promise to help you. Any big dreams you have?”</p><p>“I’ve always wanted to become an artist. I wanted to enroll at PIFA. Graphic artist or painter.” Justin shrugged.</p><p>“Impressive.” The intercom announced that their food had arrived. “Now go wash your face. Food’s here.”</p><p>They ate on the sofa in comfortable silence.</p><p>“You just had to get this shit, huh?” Brian shook one fortune cookie, pushing away his empty carton box.</p><p>“Well… I never had one. I was curious.”</p><p>Brian threw the cookie to Justin, who fumbled with it. Throwing Brian a nasty look, Justin opened the cookie from his lap.</p><p>
  <em>Your life is about to change.</em>
</p><p>“So? What does it say? No, let me guess.” Brian lay on his back on the hardwood floor. “A Sugar Daddy comes your way.”</p><p>Justin rolled his eyes. “It’s the truth.” He passed the piece of paper to Brian. “What does yours say?”</p><p>Brian frowned at the paper, then opened the remaining cookie.</p><p>“<em>There is life after marriage</em>,” he read slowly. “Did you put them up to this?” He looked up sharply at Justin.</p><p>“What? I have no idea how these things work. But you have to admit; they’re freaking accurate.”</p><p>Brian crumpled his paper, throwing it away. “I can’t believe I’ve been fooled by my best friend.”</p><p>“I still can’t believe my own family kicked me out of the house when they found out I was gay. But this is life.”</p><p>Brian searched his jacket for cigarettes, lighting one up. “My father used to beat me. He never needed a reason. I told him I was gay last year when he told me he was dying.” He lay back down on the floor. “I never had the courage to tell him. My mother is a drunk, who never cared enough to save me from his fist.” Brian let out a shaky breath, and Justin crawled by his side on the floor. He took Brian's free hand, squeezing it. Brian met his eyes. “When he died, I spent the whole night in Michael’s arms crying. Several days later he met the professor.”</p><p>“Shh. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be. You and him. I’ve read somewhere that high-school sweethearts love stories usually end up badly, because the ones involved are too young to realize that’s most likely not real love. Then later in life they meet the right one, and that’s why the divorce rate is so high.”</p><p>“And they bring kids into that mess,” Brian muttered.</p><p>“You know what Winston Churchill once said?” Justin sat cross-legged at Brian's side. “If you’re going through hell, keep going.”</p><p>“You’re smart, too; not only a pretty face.”</p><p>Justin allowed himself to smile, leaning into Brian's hand and touching his cheek. “It will be okay. You’ll be okay. I’ll be okay. Michael will be okay. Even your kids will be okay. All we have to do is get over these difficult times while we learn to heal the wounds.”</p><p>Brian moved his hand behind Justin's head, bringing him closer, and kissing him.</p><p>“You know how I used to deal with the pain my father inflicted on me? I fucked.”</p><p>Justin licked his lips. “If that’s what you need, I’m not saying no.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“I’ll be back later. You have the spare key. Feel free to go out if you want.” Brian buttoned up his shirt, raking a hand through his hair.</p><p>“Good luck. Is that what I should say?” Justin asked from the middle of the new bed. He looked thoroughly ravished, his hair in disarray with the rumpled sheet around his body.</p><p>“I guess that works.” Brian wanted to tell the kid to go to Debbie’s in case he didn’t return by nightfall, because he had a feeling he might end up being arrested. “Later!”</p><p>Brian went to his Jeep, trying to convince himself that seeing the girls with Michael wouldn’t end in a bloodbath.</p><p>He drove to what he’d called home for about seven years. Michael's sedan was in front of the house. Brian parked behind it, rolling his window down as he smoked a cigarette to calm himself.</p><p>Then he decided that he was simply stalling, but no matter what, they would all end up hurt after the conversation they were about to have.</p><p>Brian opened the front door, looking around for a sign of where Michael could be. He found him in the kitchen, leaning against the ugly, yellow counter.</p><p>Brian stopped in the doorway. He studied Michael's profile as he stared out the window. All Brian could see was a stranger wearing his best friend’s face and clothes. Even though they had only known each other a short time, he felt like he knew Justin better at that moment.</p><p>Then Michael turned to face him. Tears filled his brown eyes as he met Brian's gaze.</p><p>“Hey,” Brian greeted.</p><p>“Hi<strong>,</strong> Brian.”</p><p>Brian walked closer, touching Michael's shoulders. “Someone told me recently that even though it hurts now, it doesn’t have to hurt forever. I’d like to believe that our friendship is stronger than this. I know that I will never forgive you for the way you treated me, but I hope that one day I will be able to look at you and see my best friend. That kid I rescued from being stuffed down a toilet. The kid I barely knew but wanted as a friend. The kid I got detention for after kicking those punks’ asses.”</p><p>Michael gave him a teary smile. “I hope so, too,” he said in a rough voice.</p><p>“Come on.” Brian gave him a push toward the door.</p><p>“You took all your stuff,” Michael said in a small voice, stopping in the hallway. “When I found the closet empty, your cologne gone, your CDs…”</p><p>“Michael, we broke up. Did you expect me to stick around?”</p><p>“Where are you staying?”</p><p>Brian opened the front door. “I got a loft. Don’t worry about me. You can keep the house.”</p><p>“With all the memories we have here?” Michael cried out.</p><p>“It’s your decision. If you want it, it’s yours. But we’ll discuss that with our lawyer.”</p><p>“We’re really doing it.”</p><p>Brian refused to reply to such an idiotic comment.</p><p>They walked side by side down the street to where the girls lived. Brian knocked once before stuffing his hands in his pockets.</p><p>Lindsay invited them inside with so much coldness, Brian was afraid of what they’d say. They had to have a good plan, since Melanie was an attorney. Brian didn’t expect him and Michael to walk out the door safely.</p><p>There were cookies on the coffee table in the living room.</p><p>“Chocolate chip cookies. We’re in trouble,” Brian whispered to Michael.</p><p>Michael stifled a smile. “The last time you gave us cookies was when we had the kids over for the weekend last summer.”</p><p>“And they ended up sick after the amounts of ice cream you fed them,” Lindsay snapped. “Sit.”</p><p>Brian tried not to remember the good times they used to have. It hurt too much.</p><p>They sat on the sofa, while Lindsay sat in one of the armchairs. Melanie joined them with glasses and a bottle of whiskey.</p><p>“We talk, you listen,” Melanie started.</p><p>Brian raised a finger. “I think <em>we</em> should talk. You have to hear what happened. You don’t even know the whole story.”</p><p>“What’s there to know? You fucked up. Both of you!” She spat.</p><p>“I cheated on Brian,” Michael admitted in a small voice. The girls gasped. “I don’t know why I did it. I wasn't thinking right when it happened.” He hung his head. “I can’t believe I did such a stupid thing, but…”</p><p>“Do we know him?” Lindsay asked quietly, still surprised.</p><p>“The first time—” </p><p>“The first time?” The girls exclaimed at the same time.</p><p>“Maybe you should take your own advice and shut the fuck up. Let him talk,” Brian snapped. He leaned toward the coffee table, pouring generous amounts of liquor in the glasses. He picked one of them up, leaning back on the sofa.</p><p>“As I was saying…” Michael glanced at him. “I wanted the promotion at the Big Q. It meant more money. I didn’t like how Brian had to pay for most of our things. I wanted to be equals. So, I blew the guy competing against me, convincing him to step back. I’m not proud of it.”</p><p>“But that was, like, six years ago!” Lindsay gasped.</p><p>“I just put the puzzle pieces together. It took me a long time,” Brian said, shrugging.</p><p>“I felt terrible. You probably remember how I acted, but guilt was eating at my gut.” Michael met Brian's eyes. Brian could remember how Michael used to fidget and be so jumpy that it drove him crazy, but he’d thought it was nerves over the promotion. “Anyway, some years later, when we helped Ma get the Christmas decorations down from the attic and I hurt my back…” He sighed loudly. “My boss recommended this doctor to me who worked with the Penguins team...”</p><p>“No way!” Lindsay cupped her mouth, her eyes turned toward Brian.</p><p>Brian refused to meet any of their eyes. He hated the pity in them.</p><p>“So, yeah, the guy was a professional, but he rubbed my back, touching me like...well… he left me hard. I remember telling him that I needed a minute after the first session. He told me it happened all the time. During the second session, he straddled my ass, rubbing between my shoulder blades. He whispered to me that my little problem happened only to his gay patients. He was grinding his dick into my ass!”</p><p>“You could have told him you were married,” Brian retorted, looking out the window.</p><p>“I couldn’t do anything. It was like I was frozen.” Michael sniffed loudly. “We had twenty sessions until I caught him touching his latest patient’s ass on his way out of the exam room. I decided to put a stop to it. It had gone too far as it was.”</p><p>“<em>You</em>, jealous?” Brian snorted. “I still remember the way you clung to me when we first went to Babylon after the wedding. It was like you thought if I left your side, I’d go to the backroom with the next available, hot guy.”</p><p>“I knew how you functioned,” he said defensively.</p><p>“I promised you no more other guys when we got married.” Brian turned to him, glaring. “I had no idea I should have made you promise the same thing!”</p><p>“Did you even use protection?” Mel asked, her face scrunched in disgust.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“And so we did. We never ditched the condoms,” Brian explained.</p><p>“How did you figure it out after all this time?”</p><p>“When Theodore injured his back last year. He had three sessions. It made me wonder. But then I had my answer when Michael started coming home late at night from the comic book store.”</p><p>Mel blanched. “You mean…”</p><p>“The college professor I’ve told you all about. Ben,” Michael whispered. “I fell in love.”</p><p>“You make me sick! I chose you to be my child’s father, and look what a scumbag you turned out to be!” Melanie shouted.</p><p>“How did you know?” Lindsay asked softly, looking at Brian.</p><p>“His late nights at the store. Showering first thing when he returned home. Avoiding me like the plague if I tried kissing him at the door. His clothes smelling like another man's.” Brian said the last part looking into Michael’s eyes.</p><p>“I’m so fucking sorry, Bri.” Michael didn’t even attempt to brush his tears away.</p><p>Brian downed his glass of whiskey, sucking on his lips. He refilled the glass. “It’s for the best.”</p><p>“What about that guy you were with the other day?” Lindsay asked.</p><p>Brian glared at her. She had no right to out him like that. They both should be hugging and kissing him over having his heart broken.</p><p>“What’s she talking about?” Michael asked, confused.</p><p>Brian stood up. “It’s none of your fucking business!” He pointed his hand holding the glass at Michael. “You made me do it. It’s all your fault. You asked me a while ago where I'd been going for the past couple of months. I found a way to cope with your infidelity without actually doing it, too.” Brian took a gulp of whiskey. “I found a peep show for boys. I met a guy there. He didn’t deserve the bad hand of cards life had thrown at him. I recently saved him.”</p><p>Michael sputtered, getting up. “You… You… fucked some whore? If this is revenge, then you… You’ve lost all respect for me!”</p><p>Brian barked out a loud laugh. “Don’t worry, I’ve lost <em>all</em> my respect for <em>you</em>, Michael. And didn’t you hear? The window in that peep show room was there for a reason. I didn’t touch him.”</p><p>“But after you saved him?”</p><p>“Oh, you don’t get to act like a jealous queen. You lost your rights when you opened your mouth for that guy at the Big Q.”</p><p>“At least I never stooped so low as to find a willing guy in such a place! Who knows what kind of diseases that guy has?”</p><p>“None! I can’t say the same about you after all the guys you fucked behind my back!”</p><p>“GUYS!” Melanie shouted, going between them. “Stop. We have a lot more to talk about.”</p><p>“I have nothing more to say.” Brian went to the window, glaring outside. This talk was going downhill. Fast.</p><p>“We have thought in depth about this and we think it’s the best decision.” Melanie grabbed some papers from the bookcase, handing both of them a set. “You’re not suitable to be parents to our children. You will still be part of their lives, but we think it’s best if you gave up your parental rights so Linz and I can take care of them properly.”</p><p>Brian smashed his glass to the wall, whirling around to face them. “When did I give you the impression I’m not suitable to be a father? It’s true, I never wanted this shit, but then I met Gus. I couldn’t keep my promise to only make cameo appearances, because he’s become a big part of my life. So, don’t you dare deny me to see him or be a father to him just because Mikey bent over for the first willing dick!” He shouted. “And I’m not taking his side, but he’s been a perfect dad to JR. What the fuck is wrong with you two?”</p><p>“If you had split up during <em>your </em>numerous fights, we’d have never thought of taking your rights away,” Michael added, fists balled at his sides.</p><p>“Because we’re their mothers!” Lindsay said hotly.</p><p>“And we’re their fathers! I know you’ve wanted my rights ever since Gus had a fever that night when he was a few months old! But you’re never getting them.”</p><p>“What are we going to tell them? They’re at Dusty’s now. They’ve been wanting to see their dads for several days now.”</p><p>“Blackmail? Just try it! If you dare keep them away from us, you’ve got a new thing coming,” Brian spat in Melanie’s face. “You know Jenkins is my lawyer, and a damn good one at that. Don’t test me, Melanie!”</p><p>“Yeah, don’t let our personal problems affect them,” Michael said loudly.</p><p>“Their dads are divorcing!”</p><p>“We’ll still be here,” Brian yelled. “They’ll learn to understand it. Not tomorrow, but someday they will. Couples go through divorces all the time. Both partners see the child. Why shouldn’t we?”</p><p>“Okay, what are your plans now that you’re a free man?” Melanie folded her arms across her chest. “Let’s say Michael HAS fallen in love and sticks with this guy. What about you?”</p><p>“Oh, so you’re afraid my lifestyle will affect Gus?”</p><p>“We all know the way you acted before you got married.”</p><p>“So, you’re afraid I’ll get <em>something</em> and you won’t have my money to raise the kids?” He sneered.</p><p>“That’s not what we said, Brian,” Lindsay said softly.</p><p>“Well, you didn’t have to spell it out. I know what you think of me.”</p><p>“Are we done here?” Michael asked suddenly. Brian had rarely heard him being so harsh.</p><p>“Yes.” Melanie left the room, defeated.</p><p>“I’m taking these.” Brian picked up the plate of cookies. Justin would love them.</p><p>“Let me put them in a container,” Lindsay offered.</p><p>“Unbelievable,” Michael muttered.</p><p>“Don’t worry about the costs. If Mel persists with this charade, I’ll handle it. For both of us,” Brian promised. “They have no right.”</p><p>“Here you go. I’m sorry it came to this, but we…”</p><p>Brian snatched the plastic container from Lindsay. “You think too much. We’d never endanger our children, Linz. Talk some sense into your wife.”</p><p>“And we better see the kids soon,” Michael added.</p><p>They left together, returning to their house.</p><p>“Coffee?” Michael offered.</p><p>Brian scowled, heading to the wet bar. “Forgot this here.” He grabbed a bottle of Tequila.</p><p>“We saved that for special occasions. It’s unopened.”</p><p>“It’s a special occasion. Our marriage has fallen apart. Twelve years of friendship tested by your brainless decisions. The dikes want to take away our rights as our children’s dads. Excuse me if this isn’t a good time to open this beauty. Bring the shot glasses.”</p><p>They had bought that bottle during one of their trips to Ibiza several years ago.</p><p>They sat on the sofa, facing each other. They kept refilling the tiny glasses until Brian ditched them, passing the bottle between them. They spent half the night remembering their life together, which provided Brian with a clear sight of the future. It was a distant future, but he could see himself forgiving Michael.</p><p>It was past three in the morning when Michael's phone rang.</p><p>“Ben,” he answered, slurring the words.</p><p>Brian took a long drink from the bottle, fleetingly thinking of Justin. He was most likely asleep by now.</p><p>“Uh, at my old house… It didn’t go that well… I’ll tell you tomorrow.” Michael let the phone drop between them on the couch. “Sorry.”</p><p>“I guess I should go.” Brian got up, immediately losing balance and falling back onto the couch. “Shit.”</p><p>“You’re ass drunk. You’re not going anywhere.”</p><p>“I have someone waiting,” Brian protested.</p><p>“That guy?”</p><p>Brian turned to Michael. “He’s just a kid, Mikey. He’s eighteen. His parents kicked him out for being gay. The guy who owns Babylon also owns that fucking <em>Boys Peep Show</em>,” he explained quietly. “He exploited this kid since he was fucking sixteen. He managed to escape Sap’s claws the other night. I gave him a place to stay.”</p><p>“The same guy Lindsay said you brought here?”</p><p>“He was helping me pack.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Justin chewed on his fingernails as 11:00pm came and Brian didn’t return. He’d gone out to buy some vegetables with the money Brian had left him, but that had been hours ago. The stew was cold, waiting on the stove.</p><p>Justin decided that only one person could help him. He pulled on the winter jacket Brian had bought him and the boots before heading to the diner.</p><p>It was close to midnight when he got there. Luck was on his side when Debbie greeted him from behind the counter.</p><p>“Damn, don’t we look spiffy, Sunshine? Brian’s taking care of you?”</p><p>He blushed deeply. She should probably hate him for sleeping with her son’s husband, but technically they weren’t together anymore.</p><p>“That’s why I’m here. Brian never came back. He was supposed to see Michael and go talk to their children’s mothers.”</p><p>Worry marred Debbie’s face. “Give me a second.” She went to get her phone. “He’s not picking up,” she said, frowning. She tried again, growing more worried. “Neither is Michael.”</p><p>Something unidentified gnawed at Justin's gut. He wasn’t sure if it was the thought of Michael and Brian getting back together, the thought that something more terrible had happened, or the fear that he could end up back on the streets.</p><p>“I should probably go back in case he returns,” Justin mumbled.</p><p>“I’ll try again.”</p><p>Justin didn’t return to Brian's place. He tried to find his way to the house where Brian had taken him to pack his clothes. He was walking down a badly lit street when a car pulled up alongside him. Fear gripped his insides.</p><p>“Thought you could escape me, Blondie?”</p><p>Justin’s first instinct was to bolt. His feet felt like they were made of lead. Justin ran down the street, hoping to find a store or anything open at that time of night. He took a few bad turns, hearing the car following him. Not paying much attention to where he was going, he ended up on a dead-end street.</p><p>“No,” he mumbled. He looked around for some side door or a metal staircase, but there was nothing but a dumpster.</p><p>Taking his chance, he jumped inside, thankful for the bags muting his landing. He arranged the bags around him so if Sap looked, he wouldn’t be able to see him.</p><p>“Where did you go, you little shit?”</p><p>Justin held his breath. His heart was beating so fast, he was afraid Sap would be able to hear it.</p><p>“Fuck!” Sap spat loudly.</p><p>Then Justin heard the car’s engine starting. He stayed in the dumpster for what felt like hours, afraid to get out in case Sap was waiting around the corner.</p><p>When he found the courage to get out, it was close to daylight. He had no idea where he was, so he walked around trying to find a clue to indicate the correct way back to Liberty Avenue.</p><p>Many hours later, Justin had managed to find his way to a familiar location when he saw Sap with some of his friends on the other side of the street. Before they could look his way, Justin entered the first store he found. It was a comic book store, but he was terrified, though he knew Sap would never check for him in there.</p><p>“Can I help you?” The man restocking the shelves to the right asked.</p><p>Justin turned to him, but his terror turned to shock. <em>What were the chances?</em></p><p>He’d seen Michael’s face in the pictures on the dresser. He only had to tell him to call Brian and save him, but it would be complicated to explain how he knew Brian.</p><p>“Are you all right, kid?”</p><p>Justin's legs shook as he leaned against the door for balance. He chanced a look out the window. Sap and his friends were gone.</p><p>He slid to the floor, pressing his face against his knees. It was the only way he knew how to deal with panic attacks.</p><p>“Okay. Uh…” Michael hovered above him. “Are you hurt? Is someone following you?”</p><p>Justin looked up at him, opening his mouth. “Pl-lease. Call Bri-ri-an.” He shook in fright at the thought of Michael kicking him out of the store where Sap would see him.</p><p>Michael frowned, then his eyes widened. “You’re the twink who managed to turn his life upside down.”</p><p>Justin stared at him, confused.</p><p>“You have no idea how worried he’s been.” Michael pulled out his phone. “We got drunk last night after seeing the girls. He dropped me off at home this morning to see Ma. When she told us you came in last night searching for him, he ran out the door. Then not half an hour later he said you weren’t at his new place.” Michael put the phone to his ear. “Guess who’s at my store?” He snorted. “Wrong. Guess again… Yup.” Michael beamed, pocketing his phone. “He’s on his way. Come on. Get up from there.”</p><p>“I’m so sorry,” Justin apologized.</p><p>“Don’t mention it. I wanted to hate the guy he’d met, but that would make me a hypocrite. Besides, what he told me about you… no one deserves that.”</p><p>Justin slumped on the sofa in the corner of the store. “I thought I’d hate you, too, for how you hurt a nice man like Brian, but I guess I can’t. You’re a decent guy.”</p><p>Michael brought him a glass of water. “I have to finish restocking the new issues.”</p><p>“Got a favorite?” Justin asked.</p><p>“A favorite comic? Captain Astro. Heard of it?”</p><p>“I wasn’t allowed to read that. The gay superhero.” Justin sipped from his water.</p><p>“I have all the issues at home. I could lend you my collection.”</p><p>“I’d love that.” Justin smiled timidly.</p><p>“You got a favorite?” Michael asked.</p><p>“Spiderman. I haven’t looked at a comic book in years.”</p><p>“Here. Entertain yourself with the new issue until Brian arrives.” Michael brought him the new Spiderman comic book, pointing out the highlights of the plot.</p><p>“Huh. The graphics got better since I last saw it,” Justin said appreciatively.</p><p>“Yeah, they changed the artist.”</p><p>“Must be nice to draw superheroes,” Justin mumbled. “This is one of my dreams – to become a graphic artist.”</p><p>Michael's eyes widened. “My dream is to write my own comic book. Brian always told me it’s a kid’s dream.”</p><p>“What does he know about the beauty of comic books?” Justin chuckled.</p><p>“For some reason I expected to step into a crime scene, not you two bonding over fucking comics,” Brian commented from the doorway.</p><p>Just like that, relief washed over Justin. He abandoned the comic and the glass, running into Brian's arms. “He followed me the whole night! He’s out there looking for me. It’s all my fault. I tried finding your old house when you didn’t come to the loft. He found me.”</p><p>“Shhh.” Brian held him tightly. “Sap, you say Sap found you?”</p><p>“Yes. He won’t stop until he has me back.”</p><p>“Yeah, that won’t happen. Not while I have a say in this.” Brian carded his fingers through Justin's hair. “Come on. I’ll take you home.”</p><p>“You can keep this.” Michael brought him the Spiderman issue. He turned to Brian. “And you better come home to grab the Captain Astro collection so Justin will be introduced to that awesomeness.”</p><p>“Have you asked if he—”</p><p>“I’ve always wanted to read Captain Astro,” Justin explained.</p><p>“I don’t know why that doesn’t surprise me.”</p><p>They left the store with Brian's arm draped over Justin's shoulders.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“I was so fucking scared,” Brian admitted when they were alone in the Jeep. “I thought you left.”</p><p>Justin stared at his fingers.</p><p>“Look, I’m not mad. I was at the police station trying to find you.”</p><p>“You care that much?”</p><p>“Apparently.” Brian cupped Justin’s jaw, pulling him closer. “I don’t know how or when, but you’ve grown on me.”</p><p>Justin leaned closer, kissing Brian. It was the first time he’d done it without fear of being pushed away.</p><p>“We’re stopping by the phone store on our way to the loft. You need a phone. If you had one, this whole mess could have been avoided.”</p><p>“Really? Debbie tried calling you. Both of you! Neither of you answered.”</p><p>Brian pursed his lips. “We fell asleep after emptying a bottle of Tequila. If you’d kept calling, I bet I would have heard. Eventually.”</p><p>“Drinking with your ex?” Justin laughed, returning to his seat.</p><p>“Getting friendly with my ex?” Brian lifted a brow.</p><p>“Touche.” Justin stuck his tongue out at him.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Over the course of the following month, everyone adapted to their new life.</p><p>Especially Justin. He still wasn’t used to having a place where he could feel safe and dare he say loved. Brian showed him every day how much he cared.</p><p>When they had met, Brian had been on a small break, but he was going back to work now. It left Justin with hours to do whatever he wanted. He spent that time eating pizza and going through Michael’s collection of Captain Astro.</p><p>Sometimes he met Brian at the diner for lunch or dinner, and lately Brian had convinced him to accompany him and his friends to Woody’s in the evening. Brian’s friends had been really nice, and they didn’t judge him for who he used to be.</p><p>He and Brian had found their footing – living together and accepting each other. While Brian was an adult, Justin was still a teenager. Justin was messy, he didn’t pick after himself, and he was too lazy, but he was eager to please Brian. So he tried living up to Brian's expectations.</p><p>A week into their new life, Brian had returned home close to midnight. He’d smelled like a combination of a distillery and a whorehouse. It hadn’t taken Justin long to figure out where Brian had been. He hadn’t minded, because Brian had told him up front he planned on fucking around. Justin had only hoped Brian would tell him when that happened.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“How about we spice up the night with some Babylon?” Emmett offered. “This wet shirt contest is booooring.” He pointed to the stage at Woody’s.</p><p>“It’s a school night. I’ll take the child home, then join you,” Brian joked.</p><p>Justin appreciated that Brian remembered he was reticent to go inside Babylon. He missed it more than he thought, but the idea of running into Sap gave him the creeps.</p><p>“I guess he’s old enough to be there. We’ll keep an eye on him while you take your trick d’jours to the backroom.” Ted winked.</p><p>“I want to go,” Justin whispered. “I hate being afraid,” he added into Brian's ear.</p><p>“Let’s go.” Brian was the first out of his chair.</p><p>The four of them moved the party down the street. Ted was saying he’d stay only for a drink because he had to be up early.</p><p>“Yeah, the boss doesn’t like tardiness,” Brian said over his shoulder.</p><p>Ted was Brian’s accountant, and even though Brian talked shit about him, Justin could see he cared for him. Brian cared for all his friends, but his problem was showing them.</p><p>Brian took Justin's hand as they stepped into Babylon. “I’m right here.”</p><p>They went to the bar, ordering their favorites. Whiskey for Brian, vodka for Justin, a cocktail for Emmett, and a beer for Ted.</p><p>They were leaning against the bar, drinking, when Emmett spat out his gulp of Cosmo. The others turned to see what had shocked him so much.</p><p>Near the entrance was Michael. Beside him was a hunk of a man – all muscles.</p><p>“Damn, Kinney. You didn’t stand a chance,” Emmett commented.</p><p>Brian scowled, turning around.</p><p>“We could go if it hurts,” Justin offered.</p><p>“Are you crazy? Besides, if he dares make a scene, I have you here to show him I can still get the hottest guy in the room.”</p><p>Justin blushed furiously.</p><p>“Hey, guys!” Michael greeted them in a wary voice. “So this is Ben.”</p><p>“You’ve got some nerve, Michael!” Emmett muttered.</p><p>Brian placed a hand on Emmett’s elbow. “It’s a free country, Emmett. Besides, he’s celebrating. We just signed the divorce papers earlier.”</p><p>Justin noticed Ben felt quite uncomfortable, and soon he headed to the door. Michael ran after him.</p><p>“This is a mess.” Ted shook his head. “See why I kept denying your crazy idea from some years ago to hook up? Friends do not sleep with friends. This is what happens.”</p><p>“I stopped caring.” Brian shrugged, downing his glass. “Come.” He pulled Justin to the backroom.</p><p>They walked deep into the maze of walls and fucking men, until there was a secluded spot. Brian leaned against the wall.</p><p>“Show them what a real BJ is.”</p><p>Justin stared at the cum-covered cement before dropping to his knees. He unbuckled Brian's jeans and pulled out his hard dick. He idly wondered if Brian was ever soft. Of course, he knew Brian went soft right after they fucked, but any other time when they were ready to fuck, Brian was up.</p><p>Justin licked his lips, taking him in his mouth, humming. He’d learned what made Brian's knees weak.</p><p>“Look at you sucking cock for some dimes. I’ve always known you were a slut.”</p><p>Justin froze at the familiar voice. He felt numb inside.</p><p>Slowly, he turned to find Sap leaning against the wall opposite them. He noticed Brian glaring at Sap, recognizing him.</p><p>“Get lost,” Brian spat. He helped Justin to his feet.</p><p>“Maybe YOU should get lost. My club, my rules.”</p><p>Justin caught Brian's wrist when he made a fist with his right hand and moved toward Sap. He only wanted to get out of there. The sooner, the better.</p><p>“Since you ruined one of the patrons’ night, you’d better get busy and make my night.” Sap grabbed his junk, looking at Justin.</p><p>“No,” Justin said loudly, but his voice shook. “I’m never coming back to you. Do you hear me?”</p><p>“Oh, so you found yourself a Sugar Daddy? He’ll get tired of you. They all do. When your hole will be too loose to keep him satisfied, you will seek me out to help you.”</p><p>Brian wrapped an arm around Justin's shoulders, pulling him against his body. “You’ll never lay a finger on him again.” He nudged Justin to the exit. On the way out of the backroom, he redid his pants, muttering about cockblocking assholes.</p><p>“Leaving so soon?” Emmett asked from the edge of the dance floor.</p><p>“It was a long day,” Brian said, not stopping his gait.</p><p>At the Jeep, Justin got inside, wrapping his arms around himself and biting on his cheek to keep from crying. He hated living in a state of terror. He’d managed to put Sap at the back of his mind, and when things were looking up, he’d made an appearance to ruin Justin's life further.</p><p>“I meant it,” Brian said quietly.</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“He will never touch you again. I intend to keep that promise.”</p><p>Justin had no power left inside him to tell Brian that he couldn’t have control over something like that, so he nodded.</p><p>They drove to the loft. Brian smoked three cigarettes during the ten-minute drive.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Several days after the incident at Babylon, Brian arrived at an empty loft.</p><p>The first thing he thought was that somehow Sap had found Justin and took him, but there were no signs of struggle.</p><p>Then he found a note on the corner of the counter.</p><p>
  <em>I’m out. ~Justin</em>
</p><p><em>No shit?</em> Brian thought, appeased.</p><p>He dialed Justin's number, waiting for five long rings for the twat to grace him with an answer.</p><p>“Hey!” Justin sounded happy.</p><p>“You’re out,” Brian said flatly.</p><p>“Yeah?” He answered, confused. “Oh, the note. So many things happened! You wouldn’t believe it!”</p><p>“Where are you?” Brian wasn’t in a cheerful mood. He was close to losing one of his big accounts, and only because he refused to do the advertisement the way they wanted. He would never create something so childish, but he wasn’t ready to lose them, either.</p><p>“At the diner.”</p><p>“Let Debbie know I want a turkey sandwich. And she better not put any mayo on it this time.” Brian hung up before Justin could reply.</p><p>He changed into clubbing clothes. They were most likely headed to Woody’s after eating.</p><p>When he stepped into the diner a while later, he thought he was seeing things. Justin had a white apron over his clothes and there was even a tag with his name on his chest. He was writing on a small notepad, standing by a large group near the entrance.</p><p>“What the fuck?” Brian walked closer.</p><p>Justin looked up, beaming. “I’ll be right back, guys,” he told the group, then steered Brian to an empty booth. “I’m the new waiter. Isn’t it sweet? I came over to grab a bite and while talking to Debbie we decided that this way I could have my own money.” Justin smiled widely. “This wouldn’t have been possible without you helping me get my identity back. I can’t believe I own a driver’s license again.”</p><p>“So, your new ambition is to wait tables at Liberty Diner? What happened to becoming a painter?” Brian scowled.</p><p>“I still have to finish school for that. This is easy money.”</p><p>“You’d better drop this shit in September. I talked to your former principal. He’s accepting you back at St. James.”</p><p>“For real? When did you…? Oh, God! Brian, you just made my day!” Justin wrapped his arms around Brian's neck. “Thank you so much!”</p><p>“Don’t mention it. I promised to help you, didn’t I?” He pushed Justin away gently. “Now, where’s my sandwich?”</p><p>“Here,” Debbie said loudly, placing the plate in front of him. “I hope you’re not making him slack off.”</p><p>Justin walked backwards to the cook’s window, grinning like crazy.</p><p>“Don’t give him a hard time about this,” Debbie said softly.</p><p>“So you offered him a job here, knowing he wants something else in life.”</p><p>“I thought you’d be happy to know I have him under my wing the whole day, then you can take care of him at night.”</p><p>Brian stared at her for a long time. “He’d better be working only days. If I hear he has to work at night, you’ll have a new one coming.”</p><p>“Give me some credit. I see you care a great deal for him.”</p><p>“I have no idea how it happened, but he’s grown on me,” Brian admitted. He opened his sandwich. “Miracles DO happen. There’s no mayo.”</p><p>“Justin made it himself,” she informed him, getting up. “I expect both of you for Saturday dinner tomorrow.”</p><p>“Deb…”</p><p>“We’re all grown-ups, Brian. Let’s act that way.”</p><p>Seeing Michael and the professor was the last thing Brian wanted. He'd avoided family dinners, mostly because he found there was no sound reason for him to be there. But Debbie was more than his mother-in-law. She was the mother he’d never had. She had always been kind to him, even when he and Michael were just best friends.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“I have nothing to wear,” Justin complained.</p><p>“Quit bitching. There’s only room for one drama queen in this place, and that spot is already taken.”</p><p>Justin snorted. “Seriously, though.”</p><p>Brian browsed through the drawer Justin had filled with his new clothes. He selected a light blue shirt and a pair of cargo pants. He knew Justin loved wearing them, and they aimed to keep him comfortable.</p><p>“Try these.” Brian pushed the clothes in Justin's arms, then turned to his new closet, opening the doors. “Now, what do I wear?”</p><p>Justin started laughing, and he had a hard time stopping. Soon, Brian joined him.</p><p>He ended up wearing a beige shirt paired with his washed-out jeans. After applying some gel in his hair and a touch of Armani on his neck, he was ready.</p><p>The short drive to Debbie’s was filled with Justin talking about his new job. He seemed to be happier than Brian had seen him so far.</p><p>“Well, at least one of us is carefree,” Brian commented, pulling up on Debbie's street.</p><p>“That’s not true. I try to live in the moment, and not think of Sap.”</p><p>“Well, he won’t get his paws on you.”</p><p>“What’s wrong?” Justin asked, as Brian parked in front of Debbie’s house.</p><p>Michael's car was there, and so was Lindsay’s. He had only been worried about Michael and the professor. Now he had to worry about the vipers, too. At least he’d see his son.</p><p>“Besides dinner?” Brian pointed to Debbie's house. “I might lose one of my oldest accounts, because they have the mentality of a five-year-old.”</p><p>“What exactly do they sell? It can’t be that bad.”</p><p>Brian shot him an annoyed look, getting out of the car.</p><p>As they walked up to the red door, he took Justin's hand. Justin didn’t deserve to be treated like that. “It’s a travel agency. They want to promote their summer trips. Their ideas consist of showing a toddler playing in the sand.”</p><p>“It makes sense, but there should be several types of ads, probably. Some should show single people and couples without children. They have more fun at the seaside than the couples with kids.”</p><p>“That’s what I’ve been trying to convince them about. I will forget my rule about turning everything into sex, and do it as PG-rated as possible, but all they want are toddlers playing in the sand.”</p><p>Justin opened his mouth, but before he could give him advice, Debbie opened the front door, grinning.</p><p>“You made it. Late as usual, but you’re here.”</p><p>“We’re late? You said it started at eight,” Justin protested. “I’m so sorry, Debbie.”</p><p>“Dinner starts whenever I get here,” Brian declared, advancing into the house.</p><p>Lindsay was on the couch with the kids and Michael. In his favorite armchair sat the nutty professor, and Brian scowled at the irony. The man took everything that used to be his – his husband, and now his chair.</p><p>He could hear Emmett and Ted bickering from the kitchen.</p><p>Brian spun on his heel, pulling Justin closer. As he was about to introduce him, Emmett and Ted came into the living room.</p><p>“Some of you already know Justin, but I feel like I should introduce him.” Brian stood by Justin's side, staring at his friends, hating every second that ticked by without any of them moving.</p><p>“I didn’t think you’d come.” Michael was the first to move. He came to shake Justin's hand, then turned to Brian, a small smile on his lips. “Hi, Brian.” He wrapped an arm around Brian's. “Let me introduce you to Ben.”</p><p>Brian wrenched away. “No need.” He went to the couch, wrapping his arms around Gus. “Hey, buddy.”</p><p>He hoped someone else would see what a clusterfuck dinner would be and they’d cancel the damn thing.</p><p>Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Michael sitting on the arm of the stuffed chair, whispering hotly to Ben. Debbie stole Justin to the kitchen, along with Emmett and Ted.</p><p>“So where’s your husband?” Brian glanced at Lindsay.</p><p>“She was indisposed,” Lindsay answered diplomatically.</p><p>“Of course.” He rolled his eyes.</p><p>“We decided to give you a trial run. If everything goes well, we won’t—”</p><p>“Are you fucking real?” He snapped. “Mikey, did you hear that? We’re on a daddy trial now!” Brian turned to Michael. He wished he hadn’t. He’d seen more than he ever wanted. Michael and Ben were kissing.</p><p>Michael stood up, coming to sit on the coffee table. “Yes. Lindsay was telling me about it when you walked in.”</p><p>“And you’re okay with that shit?”</p><p>“See? Language like that will never be in your favor,” Lindsay pointed out.</p><p>“I curse. And I drink. And I fuck. And I might not be around much, but Gus is still my son. I dare you to take this to court, because you’ll lose him.”</p><p>“You upset Daddy,” Gus cried out, hugging Brian around the neck.</p><p>“Bitch,” Brian mouthed to Lindsay over Gus’s shoulder. “You hungry, buddy?”</p><p>“You upset,” he insisted.</p><p>“I’ll be fine. I’m already tons better.” Brian kissed Gus’s forehead, keeping him securely in his arms as he went into the kitchen. “Are we eating, or what?”</p><p>The air in the kitchen was thick with tension. The only one who managed to change the somber dinner was Uncle Vic. He was Debbie’s brother.</p><p>He was HIV positive, and after quite the scare several years prior, he’d returned to his cheerful self. Brian was the only one amused by Vic’s macabre sense of humor.</p><p>At the moment, while everyone was staring at their plates, barely speaking, Uncle Vic cleared his throat. He turned to Debbie.</p><p>“Quick, check my pulse. I might have died and ended up in this circle of Hell where everyone is gloomy.”</p><p>While Debbie scolded him, Brian noticed Michael whispering to Ben, probably explaining his uncle’s health.</p><p>He felt like he should explain to Justin as well, especially because he looked curiously at Vic.</p><p>“Vic’s positive,” Brian whispered into Justin’s ear.</p><p>“Oh.”</p><p>Brian saw Michael shaking his head, keeping a hand on Ben’s arm. If the professor had a problem with Vic’s situation, he’d personally bust his mouth. Ben placed his hand on top of Michael's before turning to Vic.</p><p>“How are your T cells?”</p><p>“They’ve had better days,” Vic answered diplomatically.</p><p>“I try to keep mine at 300,” Ben declared.</p><p>Before anyone could react, Brian stood up so fast, his glass of wine spilled over the table. “Mikey, can I have a word?” He didn’t wait around, simply disappearing through the back door.</p><p>“We had no idea how to tell everyone. This was definitely not the right way,” Michael said, joining him.</p><p>“Did you know he was positive?” Brian snatched a cigarette from the pack, lighting it. He kept his back to Michael.</p><p>“I found about it after the karaoke… when he came back to me. We talked a lot that day.”</p><p>“You have Vic right there.” Brian spun on his heel, pointing the cigarette in the general direction of the kitchen. “You know what your mom’s been through when he wasn’t well. Are you ready for that shit?”</p><p>Michael’s shoulders slumped and tears filled his eyes. “I thought you’d bitch about catching something from me,” he mumbled.</p><p>“You said you used protection.”</p><p>“I did.” He wiped at his eyes. “I tried to stay away after he told me, but then I realized that it didn’t matter. He’s Ben – not a disease. And yes, I have Uncle Vic as an example, which helps because I know what to do.”</p><p>“Do you?” Brian snapped, walking closer. “When he lands himself in the hospital, what are you going to do? When he shits himself? When his T-cells drop so low, this turns into AIDS? When he’s gone?”</p><p>Michael closed his eyes, tears streaming down his cheeks.</p><p>“No answer?” Brian sneered.</p><p>“I’ll face whatever happens. He doesn’t deserve being treated differently just because his ex brought home a surprise from the Baths. Ben’s had this for a couple of years. And I’m not leaving him, no matter what you or Ma or anyone else has to say.”</p><p>Brian inhaled from his smoke, peering at his old friend. “You love him.”</p><p>“I do.”</p><p>“Michael Charles Novotny!” Debbie slammed the door after her, joining them.</p><p>“Don’t,” Brian said gently, touching her shoulder.</p><p>She gave him a stern look, before turning to her son. “I forbid you to see him!”</p><p>Michael snorted, laughing and crying at the same time. “Coming from you, that’s rich!”</p><p>“Vic’s my brother. I had no choice but to accept him back home when he returned sick from New York. He’s blood.”</p><p>“Debbie, drop it,” Brian insisted. He’d realized that nothing could change Michael’s mind.</p><p>“Are you seriously accepting this insanity?” She shouted at Brian.</p><p>“It’s his life.” Brian shrugged, heading back inside.</p><p>Dinner was clearly over. The only ones at the table were Lindsay, Gus, and Justin. They seemed to be discussing Justin’s passion for painting.</p><p>Lindsay met Brian's eyes, concern marring her face.</p><p>“Don’t be surprised if Mikey leaves...and never comes back. Deb doesn’t know when to drop it.”</p><p>“That means you agree with—” She retorted.</p><p>“I understand. We all have to live with the choices we make. If Ben makes him happy, who the fuck are we to try and stop it?” Brian left the kitchen before Lindsay could say any more.</p><p>Ted, Emmett, and Vic were watching TV. JR was fast asleep in her baby basket on the armchair.</p><p>“Where’s Ben?” Brian asked, confused. He had the urge to talk to him.</p><p>“Out front. He said to let Michael know he’ll wait in the car,” Emmett whispered.</p><p>“Don’t do anything stupid,” Vic warned him, as Brian made his way to the front door.</p><p>“You better remind your sister that being positive doesn’t mean you’ll drop dead in the next second. She’s about to lose Mikey,” he said over his shoulder.</p><p>Vic hurried to the backyard before Brian could finish talking.</p><p>Brian walked slowly to Michael’s car. He knocked on the passenger-side window.</p><p>Ben looked at him, clearly surprised. He stepped out of the car, looking at him as if bracing himself.</p><p>Brian extended his right hand. “I guess I was rude when we arrived, but I hate small talk.”</p><p>Ben accepted the handshake. “Michael warned me about you.”</p><p>“That took some guts. Coming out in front of everyone,” Brian continued, dropping his hand. He lit himself another cigarette. “I guess it’s never a good time to tell people about being positive.”</p><p>“Is Michael okay?”</p><p>“Debbie’s pretty upset. I can imagine it’s difficult to be worried about her son, too. She has to worry enough about Vic.”</p><p>“We’re being careful,” Ben explained calmly.</p><p>“I’d like to say she’ll come around, but I haven’t seen her so upset in a while.”</p><p>“What about you?”</p><p>“What <em>about </em>me?” Brian narrowed his eyes. “Mikey is free to do whatever he wants.” Brian exhaled toward the sky. “He’s a tough little shit, so he’ll be fine. Let’s just hope you don’t test his nerves too often.”</p><p>“After my last visit at the hospital, I am very careful with taking my meds and going to the gym.”</p><p>“Good.”</p><p>Michael stomped toward them, his eyes red. He plucked the half-smoked cigarette from Brian's hand, finishing it in a few pulls.</p><p>“I’m done,” Michael snapped.</p><p>“She’ll come around.” Brian wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “She needs to understand that you love him.”</p><p>At Ben’s sharp intake of breath, Brian realized they hadn’t spoken about their true feelings. <em>Oh, well</em>.</p><p>“I expected her to give me advice and support me, not forbid me to see Ben. Like I’m some kid who doesn’t know what he’s getting into.”</p><p>Brian refused to point out that he didn’t know what he was getting into. Even though he had Vic as an example, one couldn’t know all the problems that came with being positive unless they lived with someone sick. Michael hadn’t been around much during his last year of college when Vic had returned from New York; then they had moved in together and only visited.</p><p>“We should go,” Ben said softly, pulling Michael into his arms.</p><p>“Don’t bother making Ma see sense,” Michael mumbled. He handed Ben the car keys, getting into the passenger seat.</p><p>Brian returned inside. Justin was standing by the door, ready to leave as well. He had a bag filled with leftover food in his hand. The others were getting their coats on. Debbie was nowhere in sight.</p><p>Brian went to Gus, hugging him tightly. “I’ll see you soon, kiddo.”</p><p>“Next weekend soon?” Lindsay asked.</p><p>“Not at Debbie’s, because I think all the future family dinners have been cancelled.”</p><p>She sighed sadly. “I was thinking… if you want… you can have him over for the weekend?”</p><p>“Sure. I’ll call you with the details.”</p><p>Brian led Justin back to the Jeep.</p><p>“It was horrible,” Justin whispered. “After you left with Michael, Debbie started shouting at Ben.”</p><p>Brian hadn’t thought of that. “I can only imagine what beautiful things she had to say.”</p><p>“She told him to stay away from her son. She couldn’t deal with him getting sick, too. It was enough that she had to play nurse to her brother. Her speech hurt both Ben and Uncle Vic. Then after more threats, she went after you.” Justin played with the ears of the bag. “Uncle Vic tried to apologize for his sister’s crassness, but Ben said he was used to it. Can you imagine having to live with <em>it</em>, and on top of that, people treating you like shit because of that? And these are the people from your community, people you go to Pride parades with, people you go to rallies with.”</p><p>“It sucks.” Brian was ready to put an end to the conversation. “Look, I can drop you home, then go to Babylon so we don’t run into that shithead.”</p><p>“And if you run into him without me? He knows you,” Justin reminded him.</p><p>“He thinks I was your client for the night.”</p><p>“Must you go to Babylon? Stay at the loft. I can entertain you.”</p><p>Brian laughed quietly. “You drive a hard bargain.”</p><p>“I can dance for you,” Justin offered.</p><p>“I’ll have to get our song ready.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Justin made Brian sit on the bed while he danced around a bar stool, slowly moving toward the wooden panels separating the bedroom from the living area.</p><p>Justin rubbed his ass against the wooden frame, touching his cock through his boxer briefs. His clothes had disappeared a short while ago after he had started the dance.</p><p>Initially Brian had been a good sport and had sat on the edge of the bed, watching him with enthusiasm. But it seemed he had lost his patience.</p><p>Justin didn't expect to be manhandled to the bed. His underwear was almost ripped in the process. Then Brian had his mouth around Justin's dick, and Justin threw his head back, moaning loudly. While Brian sucked him, he shoved a finger in his ass, then two. It didn’t take long for Justin to make a mess on his chest.</p><p>Brian flipped him over so Justin was on his hands and knees, before he pushed inside. By the time Brian was close, so was Justin, again. Being a teenager had its perks.</p><p>They fell asleep tangled in the sheet.</p><p> </p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>It was a chilly spring morning when Justin arrived late at the diner.</p><p>“If Debbie fires me, I’m so blaming you,” Justin complained, as he led the way inside.</p><p>“Stop being a twat. Make me a coffee to go.” Brian sat on an empty stool at the counter.</p><p>“I was ready to send a search party for you,” Debbie said in greeting.</p><p>“Sorry,” Justin mumbled, feeling his cheeks heating up.</p><p>Debbie pointed a finger at Brian, narrowing her eyes. “You could survive without fucking him in the morning.”</p><p>Brian rolled his eyes. “I’d know if there was any fucking involved, trust me.”</p><p>Debbie eyed him curiously, then turned to Justin who was working on preparing Brian's coffee. She leaned closer to Brian. “Okay, what gives? You could have drunk your coffee at work. Why follow him here?”</p><p>Justin placed the to-go cup in front of Brian. “We tried some Indian food last night. Turns out I was allergic to some spice they used. We spent half the night at the hospital, and slept for only a couple of hours when we got home.”</p><p>“And this morning, we searched for a pharmacy that had the prescribed drugs,” Brian explained.</p><p>“Oh, Sunshine!” Debbie hugged Justin tightly. “You’re better now, right? If you’re not okay, tell me. I can bring Kiki in early.”</p><p>“I’m fine,” Justin mumbled. “I haven’t had allergy problems since I was, like, fifteen or sixteen.”</p><p>“Which was only a couple years back. You could have mentioned you were allergic,” Brian said quietly. “You didn’t tell the doctor when we got tested back in January.”</p><p>“I ticked off the allergy bullet in the files they gave me,” Justin defended himself.</p><p>Michael and Emmett stepped into the diner, heading to the back booth.</p><p>“I’ll take the trash out,” Justin offered.</p><p>Debbie huffed, because it was clear Justin was scheming to get her to talk to her son.</p><p>Justin piled all the trash bags at the backdoor, then opened it with his elbow. He propped the door open with the brick, then began the process of throwing all the bags in the dumpster.</p><p>He threw the trap of the dumpster open and stepped on the crate next to it to make sure it was empty. His eyes widened as his blood turned to ice. The scream that left his mouth was involuntary at the sight in front of him.</p><p>In the dumpster was the dead body of a boy he knew. Jason used to be one of Sap’s boys, like Justin himself. He had been one of the courageous ones to keep mouthing at Sap, and always got into trouble.</p><p>Everyone from the diner came to the back alley.</p><p>Brian had a hand on Justin's shoulders, staring unblinkingly at the body. Emmett was sobbing openly. Debbie shouted to the cook to call the cops.</p><p>Justin turned to press his face into Brian's shoulder. “I know him.”</p><p>“What?” Brian whispered.</p><p>“He used to work for Sap.” Justin shivered.</p><p>His head already created horrible scenarios. Sap knew where he worked and had sent him a message… in the most grotesque way possible.</p><p>“Fuck the Sap,” Brian enunciated.</p><p>“If he knows where I am…” Justin said in a hitched voice, shaking in fright.</p><p>“If he’s behind this, he’ll face prison.”</p><p>The following hours were a blur for Justin. The chief of police himself came to the scene of crime. He sat Justin down at a booth and took his statement. Justin also told him about knowing the guy, and then he told the cop everything about Sap.</p><p>Brian complained loudly that evening that he shouldn’t have told the police about Sap, but Justin felt better knowing that there was a slight chance the police would question Sap and hopefully save the other boys in that house.</p><p>Justin was excused from work for the rest of the week. He was too afraid to leave the loft. He’d only adventured to the corner store, but with Brian by his side.</p><p>He spent his days drawing on the sketchpad Brian had bought him as a present.</p><p>On the following Tuesday, Brian arrived home late at night.</p><p>Justin was curled on the Barcelona chair, the lamp illuminating his sketchpad as he worked on a perfect replica of Brian’s naked body.</p><p>“Guess where I’ve been?” Brian said cheerfully.</p><p>“I’m hungry. I waited for you,” Justin commented.</p><p>Brian crouched by his side, tilting Justin's head to peer into his sad, blue eyes. “Chief Horvath called me about the Jason Kemp case.”</p><p>“Oh?” Justin pulled his bottom lip between his teeth.</p><p>“The police raided the <em>Boys</em> <em>Peep Show Club</em>. All the other boys are safe.”</p><p>Justin sighed in relief. “See? I had a good feeling about telling that man. He looked ready to help. Not many cops would go to such lengths to save fags.”</p><p>“Turns out his sister is a muncher, and he claims we’re all human.” Brian shrugged. “Anyway, it gets better.” He beamed.</p><p>“Did he arrest Sap as well?”</p><p>“Yes. The police discovered that he was behind on paying the taxes for his clubs and they want to close them.”</p><p>“Whoa!” Justin's eyes widened. “Wait, what about his friends?”</p><p>“They were arrested as well.” Brian stood up. “But I couldn’t let them close my favorite dance club,” he added casually, walking to the kitchen. “So I offered to buy Babylon. Horvath told me I have twenty-four hours before City Hall claims it as theirs.”</p><p>“Holy shit! What?” Justin exclaimed.</p><p>“You might not have nice memories in Babylon, but that’s my playground. I’ve always loved that club. I can’t think of it not existing.” Brian pulled open the fridge, and picked a casserole Debbie had sent them. “Why didn’t you eat?”</p><p>“We always eat together,” Justin said softly.</p><p>After dinner, Brian called Ted, asking if he had enough money from Kinnetik’s profits to buy Babylon.</p><p>Justin resumed his spot in the Barcelona chair. He couldn’t focus on his sketch. He couldn’t believe the lengths Brian was going to in order to save his favorite club. In that moment, Justin realized how crazy rich Brian actually was.</p><p>He couldn’t wait for September when he’d be able to finish high school, and hopefully get accepted into his dream college to pursue his love for art. He already had an impressive stack of sketches and projects he’d helped Brian with for his company.</p><p>After Justin had hinted at how he should approach some delicate accounts and what he could advertise so they would be pleased, Brian had often reached out to Justin for ideas.</p><p>It was close to midnight when Brian led Justin to the bed.</p><p>“Do you have any idea what you’re getting yourself into?”</p><p>“Your ass?” Brian joked, pushing Justin onto the bed.</p><p>“Seriously. I’m sure it’s insane to own a club.”</p><p>“We’re going to revamp it. Everyone will love Babylon, and they’ll ditch Popperz and Boy Toy.”</p><p>“We?” Justin lifted his ass so Brian could tug his pants and briefs off.</p><p>Brian grinned. “I decided to make you partner.”</p><p>Justin sat up so fast, he knocked his forehead into Brian's. They both shouted at the same time. “Sorry,” he mumbled.</p><p>“Stop being a twat.” Brian rubbed his head. “It’s safe to agree that we’re partners, right? We live together. You fucking wait for me to eat, which is scary but cute.”</p><p>“Hey!”</p><p>“And you’ve grown on me.”</p><p>“Jeez, thanks.”</p><p>“You could be a little more grateful.”</p><p>Justin slid to his knees, opening Brian's slacks. He showed Brian how happy and thankful he was with his mouth.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>Brian stood in the empty and desolate Babylon. He’d signed the papers to legally name him as the owner of the club. Sap was going to rot in prison according to Chief Horvath. They had found a lot of dirt to Sap’s name, not only being behind on his taxes. The sleaze had been found guilty of prostituting minors, illicit drug possession, and, of course, murder.</p><p>“I want a new bar counter and a better sound system,” Brian told Ted.</p><p>“Maybe you should focus on opening it and getting the money for those things. You might have gotten the club at half the price, but you will have to pay the employees.”</p><p>“Theodore, there will be at least a week before Babylon reopens. I have interviews all day tomorrow. I’m not keeping anyone who used to work here, because they were Sap’s people.”</p><p>Ted inclined his head. “I see. Well, good luck!”</p><p>Brian turned to see where Justin had wandered off to, and found him on top of one of the stands where go-go boys danced. Brian climbed up to join him.</p><p>“What do you think?” Brian asked.</p><p>“You’re crazy.”</p><p>“Aside from that.”</p><p>“Is this your midlife crisis? Buying extravagant things?”</p><p>Brian narrowed his eyes. “Midlife,” he repeated in horror.</p><p>“Well, you <em>are</em> in your thirties.”</p><p>“That’s not midlife, you twat! Don’t remind me about my age.”</p><p>Justin looped his arms around Brian's waist. “Why? Feeling depressed when you think about your teenage boyfriend?”</p><p>Brian froze. “Is that what you think?”</p><p>When he’d left Michael, he hadn’t expected to get himself in a new relationship so fast, or ever. But Justin was the perfect partner, not batting an eye to Brian fucking other guys in the backroom.</p><p>“What else <em>could </em>one think?” Justin joked.</p><p>“If you must know, it’s an early birthday present for myself.”</p><p>“So it IS a midlife crisis. You don’t like aging, so you bought this place to keep you forever young.”</p><p>Despite the fact that Justin's argument had sound logic, Brian refused to admit it to himself.</p><p>“When’s your birthday?” Justin asked, kissing under Brian's jaw.</p><p>“Next Saturday. You’d better not plan anything.” Before he could finish his threat, his phone rang. Brian stared at Michael's name, curious as to why he was calling in the middle of the day on a Friday.</p><p>“Mikey,” he answered, stepping down from the stand.</p><p>Michael didn’t answer, but Brian could hear his shallow breathing. Then he heard a sniff.</p><p>“Michael, what happened?”</p><p>“I need you here,” Michael rasped out. “I’m at Allegheny Hospital.”</p><p>Brian froze. He didn’t have to ask; he already knew that Ben had been hospitalized. The moment he’d told Michael about had come sooner than he’d expected. “I’ll be right there.”</p><p>Brian pocketed his phone. “Ted, take Justin back home.”</p><p>“Where are you going? Is everything okay?” Justin jumped down, touching his elbow.</p><p>“Guess Ben’s in the hospital. I’ll check on Michael, then come home.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>At the hospital, Brian found Michael in front of Ben’s room. The door was shut. When Michael noticed him, he threw himself into Brian's arms.</p><p>In that moment, Brian realized that he’d already forgiven Michael. It had been easier than he’d expected, because he had never truly loved Michael. And right then, Michael needed his best friend there for him.</p><p>“Shh. What the fuck happened?” Brian stroked his hair.</p><p>“He fainted in class. One of the students called me from his cell phone. I guess Ben talked to them about me.” He shrugged.</p><p>“That was nice of them.”</p><p>“His tests are messed up. The doctor just went in there to talk to him.”</p><p>Brian remembered his conversation with Ben from several months ago. “He told me he took his meds.”</p><p>“His doctor changed one of his drugs last week. That’s probably the reason why he’s in there, but I’m so fucking scared.”</p><p>“I hope you don’t expect me to tell you that it’s going to be okay, and you know I won’t because I don’t lie.” Brian pulled Michael at arm’s length to look into his eyes. “But you need to be strong and help him get through this. Not that long ago you claimed you could do it.”</p><p>“I guess I lied,” Michael mumbled. “You were right. I lived in a bubble where I thought everything was perfect, and now that I see for myself… I feel so helpless.” Tears slipped from his eyes.</p><p>The doctor left the room, staring at the two of them embracing. “Mr. Bruckner is going to be alright. We’re going to switch him back to his previous medication. He will have to stay for the weekend.”</p><p>“Thank you.” Michael nodded, as he pulled away from Brian.</p><p>With the doctor gone, Michael walked to the door. “Want to come in?”</p><p>Brian hesitated. “Justin’s waiting. The twat doesn’t eat without me.”</p><p>Michael reached out to grip Brian's hand. “I don’t want to think we made a mistake, because look at us now. I have Ben, and you have Justin. Yes, it still hurts, and I will always love you…”</p><p>Brain placed his hands on either side of Michael's face, leaning closer. “All that matters now is that we are both happy, and our friendship is stronger than I ever gave it credit.”</p><p>Michael smiled through watery eyes. Brian searched his face, then pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “I’ll always love you, too, Mikey.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>On a hot summer day, Brian returned from the gym to find Justin and Michael on the sofa arguing about superpowers for Michael's dream of writing his own comic book. They had decided to give it a test, but so far they had yet to find a subject to draw and write about.</p><p>Brian was in a bad mood over how unbearingly hot it was outside, and how he’d been dismissed by a potential trick he wanted to take to the sauna. On top of that, it looked like there was no more guava juice in the fridge.</p><p>“Didn’t you go shopping yesterday?” Brian called out to Justin.</p><p>“Yeah, I did. I got everything from your long-ass list.”</p><p>“Apparently not everything. Where’s my guava juice?” Brian snapped.</p><p>Justin frowned, not sure why Brian was so upset over juice. “There was no guava. I got orange juice.”</p><p>“Fuck orange juice!” Brian shouted, slamming the fridge door shut. He stomped in the bathroom’s direction, only to stumble over one of Justin's sneakers. He picked it up, and hurled it in the general direction of the sofa, barely missing Michael’s head. “I told you to pick up after yourself!”</p><p>Justin exchanged an amused look with Michael, who clearly knew about Brian's moods.</p><p>Curses and shouts were audible from the bathroom when the water was probably still cold when Brian entered the shower.</p><p>“Rage,” Justin said slowly, still looking at Michael.</p><p>“With mind-control powers.”</p><p>“But actually a softie at heart.”</p><p>Michael laughed loudly. “You realize he’ll kill us both if he figures it out.”</p><p>“It will be our little secret.” Justin winked. “But we need a plot. He should be a savior. He saved me… if we base Rage on Brian...”</p><p>Michael nodded. “You could describe how he saved you… if you won’t mind sharing that with the world.”</p><p>“I’d like people to know my story.” Justin grinned. “I’ll start sketching. You think of the story line.”</p><p>“Same time tomorrow?” Michael checked.</p><p>“Yes. We finally agreed on something, and I can’t wait to start drawing.”</p><p>“I better go now. Ben said he was cooking Chinese tonight.”</p><p>“We’re probably ordering Thai again. I’ve been trying to convince Brian that I could cook, but he insists on buying that stuff.”</p><p>“Surprise him with a cooked meal; don’t just tell him you want to do it. He reacts better when he’s faced with the end result, so to speak.”</p><p>Justin agreed that Michael was right. He clearly knew Brian better.</p><p>“Where did he go?” Brian was out of the shower. He stood in the middle of the loft in only a towel.</p><p>“Dinner. Ben’s cooking Chinese.”</p><p>“How domestic.” Brian rolled his eyes. “What about our dinner? Another tuna casserole or Thai?”</p><p>“Whatever. I’m not really hungry.”</p><p>“Of course. You guys pigged out on chips all afternoon.” Brian went to the fridge to take the tuna out and heat it.</p><p>During dinner, Brian asked, “So, any luck with the subject for your comic book?”</p><p>“Actually, yes.” Justin grinned. “What happened earlier? You came home already upset.”</p><p>“It doesn’t matter.”</p><p>Over the following days, Justin and Michael spent their evenings at Michael's store working on Rage. Justin returned home late at night, always too tired for any bedtime activity. On the third night, he fell asleep while Brian was fucking him. On the forth night, Brian wasn’t home when he’d returned at one in the morning. Almost two hours later, Brian stumbled inside, throwing himself on the bed and ignoring Justin, who was pretending to sleep.</p><p>He didn’t even confront him about his actions the next morning, because it was Brian's method of revenge.</p><p>On the fifth day, Michael came over to the loft around three in the afternoon. They spread all the drawings they had so far all over the floor, trying to get them in order. Then they moved to the bed to continue working on new pages.</p><p>Somehow, they had fallen asleep, and next time Justin opened his eyes, it was morning. Michael was sound asleep next to him on the bed.</p><p><em>Shit</em>. Justin sat up, afraid of Brian's reaction to them sleeping in his bed. <em>Where was Brian, anyway?</em></p><p>As Justin slowly made his way down the steps, he noticed his drawings rumpled and stained. Upon closer inspection, he realized it was actually piss.</p><p>
  <em>What the actual fuck?</em>
</p><p>Justin had never been consumed with such rage. He wanted to punch Brian.</p><p>“Michael!” He ran back to the bedroom. “Get up!”</p><p>Michael blinked awake, frowning at Justin. “We fell asleep.”</p><p>“Come see this,” Justin snapped.</p><p>Michael took in the damage with solemn eyes. “Good thing these were the copies, huh?”</p><p>Justin turned to him, pointing at a crumpled drawing of Rage against his chest. “What the fuck is wrong with him? Why would he be so mean?”</p><p>Michael eyed him surprised. “Isn’t it clear? He’s jealous. Brian saw us in the bed you two share. Just think what he might have imagined…”</p><p>Justin felt nerves churning in his stomach. “Shit.” He hoped that Brian trusted him more than that, and didn’t think he’d sleep with his ex. “Still, he has to give us an explanation about this.”</p><p>“Let me talk to him,” Michael offered.</p><p>Justin nodded. The clock caught his eye, and he cursed loudly. “I’m gonna be late for the shift at the diner. Wanna come for breakfast?”</p><p>After quickly washing off, they left the loft together.</p><p>“Has Ma asked about me?” Michael broached the dreaded subject.</p><p>“Not much, really. She keeps saying that Michael used to like that, or Michael would never question who I serve first. I guess she misses you…”</p><p>“Every time I try talking to her, she turns around or hangs up the phone. I hate making Uncle Vic the messenger.”</p><p>“You should bring Ben over to the diner. That way, she’ll get to know him and see that you really love the guy. You can’t choose who you fall for, even if they turn out to be an asshole,” Justin mumbled.</p><p>“But Ben’s not an assho… Oh.” He caught Justin's eye. “Did you tell him?”</p><p>“Like it would make a difference. Look what he did!” Justin cried out, opening the diner’s door. “He pissed on my art. That shows how much he cares.”</p><p>“And he’s here,” Michael informed Justin.</p><p>They walked over to Brian, who was seated at the counter, glaring into his cup of coffee. Debbie was on the other side of the counter, watching the scene unfolding with amusement.</p><p>“Hey, asshole!” Justin tapped Brian's shoulder.</p><p>Brian turned around, ready to snap at whoever was calling him names.</p><p>“Why would you do something so cruel?” Michael insisted, glaring.</p><p>Brian refused to answer, hoping it was clear enough why.</p><p>Justin slapped the Rage drawing onto the counter. “This is you, but you clearly don’t care. Fuck you!” He stomped behind the counter to grab his apron and start his shift.</p><p>He could hear Brian and Michael arguing, and surprisingly Debbie being on Michael's side and even smiling at him. But Justin's mind was on how he could still live with Brian after this. Maybe he could ask Debbie to let him stay with her, if she didn’t mind.</p><p>Maybe he’d fallen for Brian, but at the moment he detested the very sight of him. Brian had always praised Justin's art, and to have him denigrating it by pissing on it and ripping it to pieces hurt like nothing Justin had ever experienced.</p><p>When Justin looked toward the counter again, he noticed Brian was gone, but Debbie and Michael were hugging. He smiled, glad that at least one good thing had happened that day.</p><p>Before Michael left, he told Justin to call him if Brian was an asshole to him that evening, but he said they might have talked some sense into him. Justin highly doubted it, but it left him wondering what they could have told Brian to make him see that he and Michael had done nothing to be worried about. It was clear that Brian was wary after Michael had cheated on him in the past, but Justin would never do it.</p><p>Justin didn’t go home after his shift. He wandered around through the alleys in the park, and even stumbled over his former friend from Sap’s house. Ethan was playing the violin, and Justin remembered Ethan talking about his love for classical music. They caught up over iced coffee, with the promise to keep in touch.</p><p>When Justin returned to the loft, he found Michael and Brian at the table. There were two additional chairs. It meant Ben was in there somewhere, too. Probably the bathroom since Justin couldn’t see him.</p><p>“We made too much cauliflower pudding,” Michael explained with a smile.</p><p>Justin was actually grateful for his presence. He had no idea how to act around Brian, who seemed to be ashamed.</p><p>Justin walked over to them. Brian stopped him at the corner of the kitchen island. He handed him a stack of papers. “Not bad.” Justin noticed he was holding a fresh copy of the comic book. “But please, get my nose right.”</p><p>Justin relaxed, placing the papers back on the counter and wrapping his arms around Brian. “You’re not completely forgiven.”</p><p>“I expect to be at the end of your wrath for a while. Go wash your hands.”</p><p>Justin passed Ben on the way to the bathroom.</p><p>“Everything okay?” Ben checked.</p><p>“Yup.”</p><p>Dinner with Michael and Ben was something Justin had never thought possible, but apparently Brian and Michael had put aside their bad feelings and agreed to hold onto their friendship.</p><p>Brian offered to help Justin and Michael promote their comic book through his company. He even threw them a personalized Rage party with custom made merchandise. It was one of the first themed parties the new Babylon had seen, and everyone eagerly bought an issue.</p><p>Justin spent the rest of the summer drawing Rage. All the money he earned from selling the comic book was going to his college fund. He was determined not to let Brian pay for all of it.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>When September rolled by, Justin had endured yet another shopping trip with Brian for new clothes and school stuff. He’d missed over a year of school, but he had always been a good student. Justin had taken several tests that had accepted him as a senior.</p><p>“I’ll see you home tonight,” Brian said. “Now go and learn something.”</p><p>They were parked in front of St. James Academy, and Justin was sweating profoundly, despite the cool temperature they were experiencing.</p><p>“If anyone gives you shit, let me know. Better yet, let a teacher know,” Brian said softly.</p><p>“Yeah. Uh, it’s just… I never imagined going back here.”</p><p>“Well, here you are. You don’t want to be late.”</p><p>Justin kissed Brian's cheek, before grabbing his backpack from the floor and jumping out of the Jeep. He walked up the stairs to the entrance, talking himself out of bolting from there. Some people were already staring at him.</p><p>Brian had told him that coming up with a lie was the best choice, but he had to be careful and to keep the story from heavy details. Justin decided to go with the truth in part and explain that he’d been kicked out of his home, then he’d survived on the streets until he’d been offered a new chance. It wasn’t the best story, but he hoped no one would ask. He hadn’t been exactly popular.</p><p>On his way to his locker, he was intercepted by someone who he hadn’t seen in years. It was his best friend.</p><p>“It’s you! I couldn’t believe it. Oh, Justin!” Daphne hugged him tightly.</p><p>Justin returned the fierce hug. “Daphne!”</p><p>“What happened to you? I’d been so worried when you didn’t come to school for a week. Then I went over to your house and your dad said you were gone.”</p><p>“It’s a long story.” Justin decided at that moment that Daphne would know the real story.</p><p>“You can tell me later. What classes do you have?”</p><p>Justin pulled out his schedule, comparing it with Daphne’s. They had five classes together, which made him extremely happy.</p><p>Daphne kept him distracted enough with mindless chatter about what he’d missed, and how she’d decided what college she wanted to attend. She wanted to follow in her dad’s footsteps and become a doctor, which Justin found as a surprise. He clearly remembered Daphne’s dream had been to become an actress.</p><p>“Yeah, well, I’d rather become a doctor. It saves lives.” She shrugged.</p><p>“Did your parents not agree with your love for acting?”</p><p>She stared at him in surprise. “You remember that?”</p><p>“It wasn’t that long ago,” Justin reminded her.</p><p>“Anyway, I tried the Drama Club last year. Let’s say I’m terrible at acting.”</p><p>Justin chuckled. “Speaking of clubs. I’m late for the Art Club.”</p><p>“I’m done for today, but I’ll wait for you.”</p><p>They exchanged phone numbers, and Justin was off to his class. He tried finding some lame apology for being five minutes late when he opened the door, but his words stuck in his throat. The teacher was none other than Lindsay. She’d mentioned she used to teach, but had stopped when she had Gus.</p><p>Lindsay stared at him for a long moment before waving him inside with a smile.</p><p>When the class let out, Lindsay called for Justin to stay back.</p><p>He hovered by the door, not comfortable to be around her. The previous times she’d been around him she was nice, but Brian had always been close by.</p><p>“Brian mentioned you were returning to school. I had no idea he enrolled you in a private school,” she said, gathering her stuff.</p><p>“I used to attend this school. I guess it was easier to talk to the principal.” Justin shrugged.</p><p>“Well, I’m glad you decided to continue your studies.” She smiled, and it looked sincere. “I see you want to leave.”</p><p>“Yeah, I have to…” He didn’t want to tell her about Daphne.</p><p>“It’s okay; I’ll see you around. Remind Brian that I expect him to make an appearance at his son’s birthday.”</p><p>“Gus’s birthday? When’s that?” Justin was surprised, because Brian hadn't mentioned it to him.</p><p>“Next Thursday, but we’re holding a party on Saturday.”</p><p>“Next Saturday?” Justin had to check to know how much time he had.</p><p>“Yes. You could come, too, if you want.”</p><p>“Thank you. I’ll remind Brian.”</p><p>Justin went to his locker to get his things before heading outside. He found Daphne on the stairs, smiling at him.</p><p>“I hope you didn’t wait too long.”</p><p>“Not really. So, where do you want to go?”</p><p>“Are you hungry? I know a place.”</p><p>“Sounds good.” She led the way to a blue sedan.</p><p>“Sweet. They gave you the car.” Justin grinned.</p><p>“Don’t get excited. It’s only to get to school and back,” she mumbled. “So where <em>is </em>this place?”</p><p>“On Liberty Avenue,” he answered slowly, gauging her reaction. “The diner.”</p><p>“I hope you’re not afraid to be honest with me, Justin. I knew first, and I encouraged you to go out and have fun.”</p><p>“But then my parents found out before I could adventure there, and look what happened.” He stared out the window.</p><p>“They tried finding you,” she said, keeping her eyes on the road. “Not hard enough and not in the right places, I bet.”</p><p>“I’m sure Mom was the one who wanted me back more than Dad.”</p><p>“Yeah….” Daphne sighed loudly. “They… Maybe I shouldn’t be telling you this, but you don’t know.”</p><p>“Did something happen?” Justin turned in his seat to stare at her, worried.</p><p>“They got divorced.”</p><p>“Whoa!” His head was reeling. <em>Was it his fault?</em></p><p>In that moment, he was hit with how much he missed his parents, but then he remembered that they hadn’t tried. They didn’t try to understand his needs, they didn’t try to find him once he was gone, they probably hadn’t cared enough to think he could be on Liberty Avenue – a place they avoided.</p><p>Daphne parked on the side street, and they walked inside the diner, talking about her life since he’d been gone. She had tried finding him more than his parents. Justin was surprised to hear Daphne had adventured to Liberty Avenue for several weeks to search for him, but with no luck.</p><p>With a heavy heart at what a wonderful friend Daphne was, and how grateful he was for her, Justin left her at a window booth and went to tell the cook to make them some burgers and fries.</p><p>When he joined Daphne, he noticed her looking around, mildly curious.</p><p>“I work here,” Justin explained. “But now it’s only part-time with school starting.”</p><p>“Huh. I was so afraid you were sleeping on the streets, an innocent prey to…” He shuddered at her words. “But it looks like you can take care of yourself.”</p><p>Justin winced. She noticed it, and took his hands, asking with her eyes for details.</p><p>“Look, it’s hard to talk about it, but to sum it up… I trusted the wrong guy to help me. I ended up working in this night club… a peep show. I was safe. No one touched me,” he told her, when he saw her eyes widening. “Only that creep,” Justin added under his breath.</p><p>“Oh, Justin!” Daphne hugged him tightly.</p><p>“Yeah, so last fall some guy decided to save me from that place. Long story short, what started out like me being a kept boy… Well, I think we’re in a relationship now, though Brian would never see it like that.”</p><p>“I’m really happy for you. So tell me about your not-quite boyfriend.”</p><p>Justin beamed. “Let me bring our food.” He ran to the cook, grabbing a tray and placing their food on it.</p><p>“You said you work part-time here. When does your shirt start?” Daphne asked, picking up a fry.</p><p>“In half an hour. I have just enough time to tell you about Brian.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“All homework and no play makes Justin a dull boy.” Brian wrapped his arms around Justin's shoulders, peering over his shoulder at the notebook in front of him.</p><p>Justin shrugged him off, clicking his pen. He’d forgotten how difficult chemistry was. His tests to confirm his enrollment as a senior had consisted of English, math, economics and history.</p><p>Brian's hot breath in his ear distracted Justin, making him push away the textbook and notebook. “Maybe I made a mistake.”</p><p>Brian moved to sit next to him in a chair, pulling the textbook closer. “You have one hour. Then we’re going out.” He opened the textbook. “What don’t you get?”</p><p>“Seriously? You’re helping me with homework now?” Justin snorted.</p><p>“I offered, didn’t I?”</p><p>Laughing uneasily, Justin pointed out the lesson he had to learn. “I don’t get anything. Chemistry is worse than math.”</p><p>“Now, now. No need to be so judgmental.” Brian kept his tongue pressed to the inside of his cheek. “Let me look over this and see what I can remember. Chemistry used to be my favorite subject. That’s where I learned how to make the bomb to blow up the school.”</p><p>Justin rolled his eyes. Brian was just trying to be nice. He wouldn’t hold his breath for another tutoring lesson, although he appreciated Brian's help.</p><p>It was Friday evening, and they were staying inside doing homework. For Justin, this would be a normal evening, since he’d barely left the loft besides going to school and work. Brian had kept to his life and had returned late each night during the week.</p><p>When they were finally done and Justin understood the lesson enough to make sense for him, it was close to nine.</p><p>“Get dressed.” Brian commanded, disappearing into the abyss of his closet.</p><p>“But I don’t feel like going out.”</p><p>“You’ve been studying every night for the past week. I think you deserve a break. What kind of teenager are you?” Brian reemerged in only jeans and holding two shirts. He walked in front of the mirror, holding them to his chest and contemplating his choice.</p><p>“The white one,” Justin suggested, licking his lips. He simply loved Brian wearing that white, sleeveless shirt paired with his washed-out jeans.</p><p>Brian chucked the green shirt away, meeting Justin's eyes through the mirror. “Why aren’t you getting dressed?” He demanded.</p><p>“I already am,” he protested, tugging at his plaid shirt.</p><p>“Oh, no! You’re not wearing that.” Brian pulled him by his side. After rummaging through Justin's drawer and his own closet, Brian handed Justin a red, short-sleeved shirt and a pair of dark jeans. “Come on. While I’m still young.”</p><p>Justin gasped, recalling his conversation with Lindsay. While he got dressed, he mentioned her proposal to Brian after explaining that she was his teacher.</p><p>“I had no idea she went back to teaching,” he said, confused.</p><p>“Well, they have two children…”</p><p>“For whom both Mikey and me provide more than they need,” Brian quipped. “You know what this is. It’s Lindsay’s way of showing us they can provide for the kids without our help.”</p><p>“I don’t think it’s that. They dropped the case, right? They don’t want you to give up your rights anymore.”</p><p>“Who the hell knows <em>what </em>they’re thinking? I bet they’re plotting something.”</p><p>On the way to the Jeep, Justin tried to lighten the mood, seeing how upset Brian had been. “So, what should we buy Gus?”</p><p>“We?” Brian turned to face him when they reached the Jeep.</p><p>“I was invited, too,” Justin mumbled.</p><p>“Interesting. I’ll think of something.”</p><p>“Well, what does he like?”</p><p>“Justin, the last time I was over, he was into robots after watching some cartoon. He’s never liked robots before. He used to be into dinosaurs, but not anymore. So his opinions are fickle like that.”</p><p>“There must be a constant. I liked to draw since I learned how to do it. There was never a time I didn’t have a paper and pen nearby,” he explained.</p><p>“Gus likes to color.”</p><p>“Maybe a nice coloring book and a new set of pens?”</p><p>“That’s a good idea.” Brian nodded.</p><p> “I could help. I have to go by the art store and get a few things,” Justin offered.</p><p>Brian met his eyes, smiling. “I’ll give you some money.”</p><p>When they arrived at Babylon, it was late. Brian stopped at the bouncer to check how things were before taking Justin to the bar. He ordered two beers and also reminded the bartender to give Justin whatever he wanted. On a previous visit, Brian had found Justin sulking by the bar because the guy refused to sell him margaritas.</p><p>“Look what the cat dragged in,” Emmett cheered in greeting.</p><p>“We thought you weren’t coming tonight,” Ted said.</p><p>“Yeah, I had to help the lad with his homework.” Brian rolled his eyes, elbowing Justin in the ribs.</p><p>Justin blushed, thankful for the dim lights. He sucked from his beer.</p><p>“Did Michael make it and already leave?” Brian leaned next to Emmett, drinking from his bottle.</p><p>“Don’t you know? He’s home for the whole weekend – daddy duties.” Ted widened his eyes.</p><p>“Why would I care if he was into that?” Brian scowled. He could say he didn’t even know his friend anymore.</p><p>Emmett laughed loudly. “They have JR over for the weekend.”</p><p>Brian choked on his gulp of beer. The world was coming to an end. The munchers allowed Jenny to stay with Michael? Brian hoped Mikey didn’t have to beg too much to have his child for a couple of days.</p><p>“I guess he was jealous you already had Gus over twice last month, while he’d only gotten to see Jenny; never for a sleepover,” Emmett said.</p><p>“Could be. It’s not my fault he has no clue how to talk to the girls in order to get what he wants.” Brian shrugged.</p><p>Justin cringed, clearly remembering the screaming that had led to Lindsay bringing Gus over one hour after the worst phone call he’d ever witnessed.</p><p>“Let’s dance.” Brian pulled Justin to the dance floor.</p><p>“I like the changes,” Justin declared. “The music is a lot better. And the blue lights are a big improvement over the multicolored shit Sap had in here.”</p><p>“Why, thank you.”</p><p>“And I have to admit, the backroom is a lot cleaner.” Justin grinned.</p><p>“Of course it is! The cleaning staff is actually doing their job. You could snort coke off the floor. And the toilets have never been cleaner,” Brian explained.</p><p>Justin laughed, grinding against Brian in time with the wild beat. “Thank you!” He kissed Brian softly.</p><p>“What for?” Brian placed his hands on either side of Justin's waist.</p><p>“For saving me. I still can’t believe this is real… that I have another shot at life.”</p><p>Brian leaned closer, pressing his forehead against Justin's, glad the song had changed to a slower one. He swayed them in rhythm. “I wouldn’t have it any other way. You saved me, too, Sunshine.”</p><p>Justin took Brian's head in his hands, kissing him passionately. They kept kissing until the song morphed into a faster one. Brian took Justin's hand, leading him to the door.</p><p>“Where are we going?” He was surprised by the shift in Brian's mood.</p><p>“Home. I want to fuck you into the mattress.”</p><p>“The backroom is closer. I’m horny as hell!”</p><p>“There’s no mattress in the backroom.”</p><p>Justin bit on his lips to keep from commenting that Brian cared enough about him to take him home instead of fucking in that place.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>On Tuesday, Justin was running late for his shift at the diner. After school had let out, he’d run to the loft to do his homework so he’d be free after his shift. Sadly, it took him longer than expected to finish the English essay.</p><p>Justin was surprised to find Brian outside the door, about to head inside the diner. He skipped to his side, wrapping his arms around the man he loved.</p><p>“Hi!” Justin beamed.</p><p>“What are you doing here?” Brian frowned.</p><p>“I have my shift this afternoon.” Justin pulled away, confused.</p><p>“Exactly. I expected to find you already busing tables.”</p><p>“Oh. I lost track of time. Homework,” he explained.</p><p>With their arms wrapped around each other and kissing, they stepped into the diner. Justin furtively glanced around, hoping Debbie wouldn’t go for the jugular due to his tardiness.</p><p>But what he saw instead made Justin freeze. At the counter, talking to Debbie and drinking what looked like tea (judging by the tea bag next to the cup), was his mother.</p><p>“Fuck.” Justin noticed his mother turn to look their way. He held her worried gaze for a long moment before he disentangled from Brian. Then he fled from the diner, not caring if Debbie fired him or not.</p><p>He ran without any destination in mind. He bumped into people on the streets.</p><p>All his thoughts were on how in the hell had she found him? Then he figured it had been Daphne’s ‘good deed.’ He wanted to be upset and rip his friend a new one, but she had probably been trying to help.</p><p>As Justin slowed to a stop, out of breath, he noticed his feet had carried him to the park. He slumped on the nearest bench, dropping his head in his hands.</p><p>The sight of his cultured mother in a place like the diner on Liberty Avenue had been surreal. But as the shock of seeing her after two years wore off, a new thought occurred to him.</p><p>She had cared enough to reach out, to go to a place like the diner in order to find him.</p><p>Justin entertained the thought of going back and confronting her, but there was a churning in his stomach when he imagined how the conversation would go. He knew that his mother deserved the truth, and he was afraid of hurting her. A part of him still blamed her for having to leave home. She could have talked some sense into his dad, but she hadn’t even tried. Justin had thought they were closer than that, but she had cared more about her marriage. Or maybe she hadn’t wanted to drag his little sister into the mess as well. Though, according to Daphne, they were divorced now.</p><p>“Justin?” A familiar voice called his name.</p><p>He looked up to see Ethan. His old friend from his time with the Sap. Despite his promise to keep in touch the last time they had run into each other, Justin hadn’t made any attempt to contact him.</p><p>“Hey Ethan,” he answered in a gruff voice. Justin cleared his throat, hoping there weren’t tears in his eyes.</p><p>“Everything okay?” Ethan sat next to him.</p><p>“Long story. Still playing the violin?”</p><p>“It’s easy money. It’s what I like.” Ethan shrugged. “How have you been?”</p><p>“I…I’m well. I went back to school.” He started telling Ethan everything about his new life. It took his mind off seeing his mother.</p><p>They talked until dusk settled around them, along with the cold. Ethan suggested they go to his little studio to warm up.</p><p>They were in the middle of drinking tea, while Ethan was telling Justin about some gig he hoped to get, when his phone rang. Justin excused himself, going to the window for some faux privacy.</p><p>“Hey,” he whispered, staring at his reflection.</p><p>“Where are you?” Brian asked in a somewhat worried voice.</p><p>“Uh, I’m okay. Look, I need some time.”</p><p>“What’s that supposed to mean?”</p><p>“I can’t… I panicked, okay?” Justin grunted.</p><p>“I noticed. Now tell me where you are so I can come pick you up.”</p><p>“Promise not to take me to her?”</p><p>“I promise,” Brian declared.</p><p>“Hold on.” Justin turned to Ethan. “What’s the address?” He repeated to Brian what Ethan told him, then hung up.</p><p>“So, that’s your Sugar Daddy?” Ethan asked, staring into his cup of tea.</p><p>“My boyfriend,” Justin explained. “Look, I’d like to keep in touch.”</p><p>Ethan gave him his number with a smile. “Seems you really hit the jackpot.”</p><p>Justin slumped on the sofa, petting Ethan’s cat who had jumped onto his lap. “I got really lucky.”</p><p>“Okay, then what’s wrong? Is he an asshole or something?”</p><p>Justin closed his eyes. “The reason I was in the park… I… My mom found me. She was at the diner. Where I work,” Justin said, in case Ethan had forgotten that part of the story. “She was there, talking to Debbie!”</p><p>“Shit.”</p><p>“Yeah. I have no idea what to think of it. Does she want me back? If yes… what are the terms? If no, why bother? She must really want me back, because she clearly swallowed her pride to be in a place like that.”</p><p>Ethan went to sit next to Justin, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. It was a familiar gesture. They’d comforted each other enough times in the past. Justin turned his head into Ethan's chest, trying not to cry.</p><p>“Shh. I’m here.”</p><p>They sat like that until there was a knock on the door.</p><p>“Must be your boyfriend,” Ethan said, disentangling himself from Justin.</p><p>As he went to answer, Justin wiped his tears, composing himself. He looked up in time to find Brian staring at him from the doorway. His expression was unreadable.</p><p>Justin walked to him slowly. He stopped to hug Ethan and promised to call him before he pushed between Brian and the doorway, heading toward the stairs. He could hear Brian’s heavy footsteps behind him.</p><p>In the Jeep, they sat in complete silence and darkness.</p><p>“Is he your fuck buddy?”</p><p>“What?” Justin gasped, shocked Brian could be that insecure, but then again the poor guy had a bad past.</p><p>“Just answer me.”</p><p>“No. I think I mentioned Ethan. We used to share a room toward the end of my stay at Sap’s.” Justin decided it wasn’t wise to say that they’d shared a bed, and sometimes they’d found solace in each other’s touch. That was all in the past.</p><p>“Whatever.” Brian started the engine.</p><p>Fear gripped Justin's inside. “Brian.” He placed a hand on Brian's leg, leaning closer. He startled at the repulsed look on his face. “Nothing happened. I promise.”</p><p>Brian nodded, clearly not believing him.</p><p>They were quiet until they entered the loft. Justin couldn’t take it anymore. He pushed against Brian's shoulder, making the man stumble, startled. Before he could snap at Justin, Justin was in his face.</p><p>“Listen here, and listen good! I am not Michael. I would never fucking cheat on you! I still can’t believe someone could do that when he had you by his side!” Justin held Brian's eyes. “Ethan has been my friend since I met him at Sap’s. He’s not like Sap or his greasy friends. He wanted a normal life, just like me. And he’s on his way to getting his shit together, and I’m happy for him. He’s my friend and I plan on seeing him again. So, don’t try the jealous queen act!” Justin was so close to Brian's face, he could feel his hot breath on his lips. “I’m not a cheater!”</p><p>“God,” Brian breathed out, smashing his mouth to Justin's, surprising him. “You’re so hot when you get all riled up.”</p><p>Justin ended up pressed against a beam in the middle of the loft, being fucked against it. He held onto the beam as Brian pushed into him, holding him tightly in his arms.</p><p>“If that was make-up sex, I want it more often,” Justin said later, much later.</p><p>They had moved to fuck against the kitchen isle, toppling over one of the stools in their frenzy to get connected again.</p><p>Now they were lying on the bed, catching their breath and grinning.</p><p>“I’m up for Round Two of fighting.” Brian placed the cigarette he was smoking between his lips, going to search for something in his jeans. He returned with a purple sticky note. “Here is your mother’s phone number.”</p><p>“Whoa!” Justin sat up, glaring daggers. “This fight won’t lead to sex, it will lead to me punching you in the face!”</p><p>Brian rolled his eyes, placing the paper on the nightstand. “Take your time. Debbie and I explained to her that you might need a while to come around.”</p><p>“You talked to my mother?” Justin asked in a high-pitched voice he wasn’t proud of.</p><p>“She was really worried. You should have seen her face after you left. I’ve never seen anyone so heartbroken.”</p><p>“Fuck.” Justin coiled up, wrapping his arm around his knees. “I’m scared,” he mumbled.</p><p>Brian sat next to him, exhaling smoke toward the ceiling. “We told her not to attempt to seek you out again. But she might not listen. She loves you, Justin.”</p><p>“What does she want?”</p><p>“To talk to you,” he said softly. “If she wants you back… it’s your call where you want to be.”</p><p>“Here, with you.”</p><p>Brian smiled indulgently. “I won’t keep you a prisoner if you want to go live with your mother.”</p><p>“Did you hear me, old man?” Justin raised his voice. “I want to stay here, with <em>you</em>!”</p><p>“Who are you calling ‘old man’?” Brian sneered, stubbing out his cigarette before pinning Justin to bed.</p><p>Justin chuckled. “Touchy.”</p><p>Brian devoured his mouth, pushing two fingers into Justin’s used hole. “Fuck. You’re always so fucking tight.”</p><p>“Thanks?” Justin laughed breathlessly.</p><p>Brian folded Justin in half, bending to lick around the tender flesh of his rosebud, slowly fucking him with his fingers. When Justin was on the brink, Brian flipped him over, pushing inside after covering his dick in latex. Justin threw his head back, not sure how every time they fuck it was new and different. Brian hovered over his body, reaching out to intertwine their fingers as he moved his hips slowly.</p><p>This was lovemaking, but Justin knew better than to say anything out loud.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>At school Justin tried to keep away from Daphne, but eventually he forgave her. She was almost in tears, apologizing. She’d thought her gesture would make him happy.</p><p>Justin befriended Lindsay, and they always lingered after his last class, chatting about art, about Gus, about Brian. Justin was glad that after almost a year since everything had happened, life was getting better for everyone.</p><p>With Lindsay’s suggestions in mind, he went to buy Gus’s birthday present from the art store. He ended up spending more than he’d told Brian, but Brian had told him not to worry about the money when he’d handed him his gold credit card.</p><p>On the days heading toward Gus’s birthday, Justin readjusted to living by looking over his shoulder. This time, it wasn’t Sap he was afraid of. It was his mother.</p><p>He’d caught glimpses of her in the school parking lot, at the deli he’d met with Ethan one evening, and out the window at the diner during his shift. She seemed to be everywhere.</p><p>It was during Gus’s birthday that Justin made the decision. It took him seeing Lindsay and Melanie interacting with their children to understand the unconditional love a mother has for her child, including Debbie’s love for her son and ‘her other boys.’</p><p>“You look like you could use one of these.” Michael joined him on the couch with a glass.</p><p>The spiked punch hidden in the kitchen had kept the adults sane. Justin accepted it with a smile.</p><p>“What’s wrong?”</p><p>“I’m thinking,” Justin mumbled. “And don’t say it’s a dangerous sign.”</p><p>Michael snorted. “Don’t confuse me with that caveman you live with.”</p><p>Justin licked his lips while watching Brian with Gus. The party guests ages three to five had left earlier, leaving only family in the girls’ house. Everyone had retreated to different corners to recover from the long day.</p><p>Melanie took JR to bed, and she hadn’t made it back. Ben was in the armchair by the window looking through a book. Brian was on the carpet coloring with Gus. Debbie had offered to clean the kitchen of dirty dishes. Lindsay, a true WASP, couldn’t allow Debbie to do all the work, so she’d joined her.</p><p>“So?” Michael pressed.</p><p>“You know how my mother tried contacting me,” Justin started in a small voice.</p><p>“I heard.”</p><p>“Well, I think I’m ready to hear her out. But I don’t want to talk about that.” Justin caught Michael’s eye. “Let’s talk about Rage.”</p><p>“Maybe we should take a break until you finish school,” Michael said quietly, glancing Brian's way.</p><p>“Wow. So he put you up to this? I can make my own decisions, you know?” Justin huffed.</p><p>“But he’s right. You need to focus on school.”</p><p>“I can go to school, work at the diner, and draw Rage in my free time. It relaxes me – drawing. Don’t try to make me stop drawing. It keeps me sane.”</p><p>His speech grabbed Brian's attention, exactly what Justin had wanted. They kept eye-contact for a while before Brian rolled his eyes, returning to the coloring book.</p><p>Did that mean Justin could still draw Rage? He had to revisit the Brian Kinney manual and check what eye rolling meant.</p><p>“We’ll brainstorm some time next week,” Michael told him.</p><p>“Perfect! Let me know beforehand so I can clear the evening.”</p><p>“If you keep him from studying, I’m going to cut your balls off, Mikey!”</p><p>“Not from studying, just tiring me out so much that I wouldn’t be able to keep you satisfied deep into the night per our agreement.” Justin laughed at Brian's horrified look and Michael's scandalized look.</p><p>“You said it was consensual!” Michael cried out.</p><p>Justin laughed louder. Brian huffed. “Don’t mind him. He’s a twat who lives a fairy tale inside his little head.”</p><p>“A fairy tale where you use him during the night?” Michael retorted.</p><p>“Oh, my GOD!” Justin wheezed out. “It’s a joke. Would you stop worrying? I’m not his kept boy or anything,” he said, throwing Brian a wide smile.</p><p>“If you want to label it,” Brian started. “We’re partners.”</p><p>Justin touched his heart, widening his eyes. “The Big Bad said partners. Did you hear that, Mr. Bear?” He picked a teddy bear up from his right on the sofa.</p><p>“I don’t know why I bother.” Brian stood up. “We’d better get back. I have to be at Babylon by seven.”</p><p>“Why? Do you have dick sucking appointments now?” Justin slapped a hand over his mouth, horrified at what he’d said in front of Brian’s son.</p><p>But Brian seemed amused by his brazen comment, laughing loudly. “I actually have to talk to my manager about livening up the place. You could join me if your homework is done.”</p><p>Justin wanted nothing more than to lie and say his homework was done, but he knew Brian would find out he was nowhere near finished with his calculus problems and his history research. “Some other time,” he sighed.</p><p>“Good boy. I’ll let Lindsay know we’re leaving.”</p><p>“What?” Justin asked, self-conscious when Michael kept looking at him.</p><p>“I don’t know what you did, but he’s changed. I mean, he’s the same Brian, but something’s different.”</p><p>Justin chewed at his bottom lip. He had the same feeling, and a part of him already knew. Brian was falling for him, but he was too proud or too scared to admit it.</p><p>“Phanks for the dwawing, Jus!” Gus snuggled close to him, making Justin's heart speed up.</p><p>He had made a portrait of Gus and his dad as a present. His only interaction with Gus had been saying hi and handing him the gift bag. They rarely talked much during Gus’s visits to Brian's loft. Justin usually stayed out of their way.</p><p>It made him feel strange to have the small boy hugging him, feeling his warm, little body against his side. His eyes were the exact shade of hazel as Brian’s and Justin smiled. He kissed the top of Gus’s head, squeezing him close.</p><p>“Glad you like it.”</p><p>“Did you dwaw it?”</p><p>“Yes.” He nodded. “I could teach you, but some other time? When you visit us?”</p><p>Gus grinned, snuggling even closer.</p><p>Justin looked up to see Brian, Lindsay, and Debbie in the living room doorway. They were all watching them, smiling.</p><p>“I have to go, Gus.”</p><p>Gus rushed to his dad, hugging his legs and tugging on his pant leg. Brian complied, bending down to listen to the secret spoken too loudly by Gus. “I weaaaallly like Jus, Daddy!”</p><p>Brian caught Justin's eyes over Gus’s head, then focused on his son. “Good. Because I really like Jus, too.”</p><p>Justin thought he’d died for a second. Brian had admitted in front of everyone that he liked him.</p><p>Michael shot him a pointed look, and Justin couldn’t be bothered. He kept smiling as he floated to the Jeep. Or so it felt like he was floating. He tried not to envision his reaction to Brian plucking up the courage to admit that he loved him. Justin could-honest-to God drop dead, probably.</p><p>At the loft, Justin went to the dresser, searching for the purple sticky note. It was gone. He started searching for it, bending to look under furniture, thinking it had fallen.</p><p>“If this isn’t the best sight in the world,” Brian commented, joining him in the bedroom.</p><p>Justin braced himself with his palms on the bed. “I’m looking for…”</p><p>“Condoms are in the nightstand.”</p><p>“The note with Mom’s number,” Justin mumbled. Of course, Brian had a one-track mind. Sex was always on the table for him.</p><p>Brian tossed his shirt on the bed, holding Justin's gaze, searching if he was serious. “It’s on the fridge door. It shows how much you wanted to contact her. You didn’t even notice it.”</p><p>“I want to now,” Justin said hotly.</p><p>“What made you change your mind?”</p><p>“I’ve seen a lot of displays showing a mother’s love today. I miss it. I guess I’m ready to hear what she has to say,” Justin explained. He went to the fridge and stopped in front of it. His fingers shook as he reached to take the note from under the Ibiza beach magnet. “I might give her a call later.”</p><p>“If you’re not ready, don’t rush it. You might have another panic attack,” Brian said gently, standing between the panels dividing the bedroom from the living space.</p><p>“No, I’m ready.” Justin shook his head, then he nodded. “Fuck. I’m…”</p><p>“It’s all right.” Brian came to stand by his side. “Take your time, Sunshine.”</p><p>“I don’t plan on leaving you. I just want her back in my life.”</p><p>“We had that talk. Besides, I’d like to say I understand you, but I don’t. My mother is a frigid bitch.”</p><p>“You never speak about your parents.”</p><p>“There’s nothing to say. We had this conversation once. Let’s not rehash it.” He spun on his heel, heading to the bathroom.</p><p>When Justin heard the shower running, he decided to join Brian, because… Well, he didn’t really need a reason. Justin discarded his clothes on the bathroom floor, stepping in behind Brian.</p><p>“Can’t even shower in peace,” Brian grumbled teasingly.</p><p>“You really like me,” Justin whispered, kissing a spot between Brian's shoulder blades.</p><p>“Not particularly right now.”</p><p>“Let me try better.” Justin looped his arms around Brian, finding his half hard dick, and started stroking. After adding some shower gel, he continued rubbing Brian’s erection while pushing his own dick against the small of Brian's back. When he shifted a little, Justin's dick ended up snug between Brian's ass cheeks, making them curse loudly.</p><p>“Don’t get any ideas,” Brian threatened him.</p><p>“I…”</p><p>“For fuck’s sake! I don’t bottom!”</p><p>“Just once?”</p><p>“Some other time <em>maybe</em>. Now…” Brian turned around, pushing Justin face first into one of the glass walls. “Let me show you how it’s done.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>After Brian left, Justin had tried to concentrate on his homework, but all he could think about was calling his mother.</p><p>He slammed his history textbook shut. He picked up his phone from the coffee table, scrolling to where he’d saved his mother’s number.</p><p>Justin stared at the word ‘Mom’ until his vision blurred, then the screen blacked out. He tapped the screen again, ending up dialing the number.</p><p>There was no time to panic, so instead of ending the call before it could connect, he placed the phone to his ear. One ring. Two rings. Three rings. Four rin—</p><p>“Hello?”</p><p>Justin gasped at the sound of his mother’s voice. “Hi,” he croaked.</p><p>“Hello?” She repeated, confused.</p><p>Justin cleared his throat. “It’s me. Uh, Justin.”</p><p>“Oh, honey!” She exclaimed. “I thought you’d never call back.”</p><p>“I guess I panicked when I saw you in the diner,” he said, tugging at a loose end on his sweatpants.</p><p>It was awkward as fuck, and he had no idea why. It shouldn’t be awkward. This was his mother.</p><p>“Oh, Justin! I’ve missed you so much! You have no idea…”</p><p>“Can we…talk somewhere? Like, face to face?”</p><p>“Of course, honey. Let me know where you are comfortable to do that.”</p><p>“How about your place? Daphne said you moved.”</p><p>“Are you sure?” His mom checked.</p><p>“I bet it’s difficult to find a sitter on such short notice. And I miss Mollusk,” he admitted.</p><p>“I’ll text you the address,” she offered.</p><p>“Whoa! Who are you and what have you done to my mom?” Justin chuckled. She was a notoriously terrible texter.</p><p>“I learned,” she answered, laughing.</p><p>Justin waited for the text message, which came ten minutes after they had hung up. It was a short address, but he guessed his mom wasn’t that good of a texter after all.</p><p>Justin wrote Brian a note, saying he was going to see his mom and leaving her address at the bottom of the page.</p><p>He had to take the bus, which he usually avoided, but the ride cleared his head and made him think of the upcoming conversation.</p><p>It was early evening when he knocked on the simple white door. The house was part of a duplex from what he could see.</p><p>The door opened, making Justin fight his instinct to turn around and run for the hills. Before his feet could take him away, his mother wrapped her arms around him, pulling him inside. Justin relaxed, hugging her back and allowing her to sob into his shoulder.</p><p>“Oh, honey! Look at you!” His mom pulled back to give him a once-over.</p><p>Justin chewed on his lips, overwhelmed with emotion.</p><p>“Come on. I have brownies. Your sister demanded we bake some yesterday.”</p><p>Justin smiled, following her to the kitchen. It was so small compared to the house he’d grown up in.</p><p>“This house is nice,” he commented. “It has style.”</p><p>“Thank you, sweetie.”</p><p>Justin sat in a plain, white wooden chair. “Would you mind making some coffee?”</p><p>“No problem.”</p><p>While his mom prepared the coffee, Justin looked around the small kitchen. It had only four cupboards, a stove, a fridge, the microwave oven, and the coffee maker. The table was enough to seat three people, because the fourth one was against the wall.</p><p>“So, why did you leave Dad?” The curiosity was getting the best of Justin.</p><p>His mom turned to look at him for a brief moment, then focused on the coffee. “It’s not your fault.”</p><p>“Did I say that?”</p><p>“We hadn’t been happy for a while. He started coming home late or not coming home at all… after you left.”</p><p>“You mean, after he kicked me out?” Justin said, bitterly.</p><p>His mom sniffed loudly as she poured coffee into two mugs. She placed sugar and cream on the table along with the mugs, then sat down.</p><p>“So, he cheated on you?” Justin guessed.</p><p>She nodded. “I’d suspected it, and one night I confronted him. He didn’t deny it. I decided it was best for Molly to simply leave. I was too tired to fight for someone I couldn’t recognize anymore.”</p><p>“I’m sorry, Mom.” Justin took her hand. “It sucks that your marriage ended like that. But I’m glad you chose what’s best for Molly.” He bit on his cheek to keep from commenting that she should have done the same for him.</p><p>“Oh, sweetheart! I was afraid of what Craig might do if I openly defended you that day. I tried, if you remember, but he was… I’ve never seen him so enraged.”</p><p>“Over some drawings! It wasn’t like you guys caught me with a guy naked in my bed. Talk about being insecure and homophobic,” Justin mumbled.</p><p>“I tried to tell Craig that we’ve always known, even though there hadn’t been evidence. You’ve always been more sensitive and preferred arts over sports.”</p><p>“You think gay people don’t like sports? What sort of misconceived ideas do you have? We’re like everyone else...well, except, we like dick.” Justin smirked.</p><p>His mother flinched, making Justin see that she wasn’t that understanding after all.</p><p>“So, why did you seek me out?”</p><p>“Daphne called me to say you were back at school. I couldn’t believe it. She told me a place you usually go to – that diner.”</p><p>“I work there,” Justin told her.</p><p>“That’s what you’ve been doing ever since…” She gulped, tears swarming in her eyes.</p><p>Justin sipped from his coffee, avoiding her eyes. “When I left, I went to the only place I knew I belonged to – Liberty Avenue. And I met this guy…”</p><p>“That man I saw you with?”</p><p>Justin shook his head, chewing on his lips, trying not to fall apart. For some reason, it was difficult to tell his mother. It made him realize how many things could have gone wrong.</p><p>“This man took me to his place. He had other boys my age there.”</p><p>She gasped, nearly spilling her coffee.</p><p>“It wasn’t like that. Not really,” Justin hurried to explain. “This guy, Sap, he owned two clubs. One was the usual night club, the other was a…” He stopped, afraid to tell his mother.</p><p>“Tell me.”</p><p>“A peep show. So, I was safe. No one touched me.”</p><p>Tears slipped from her eyes. “But you undressed for those people?”</p><p>Justin shrugged. “It wasn’t a big deal. You know I like dancing. So most of the time, I didn’t even pay attention to them.”</p><p>“Oh, honey! And to think this is all your dad’s fault!” She lunged to hug him tightly.</p><p>“I managed to escape from there,” Justin continued, deciding to leave out the part where he was almost raped. “I bumped into one of my clients at the diner. Brian had recently found out that his husband had cheated on him, and he was starting a new life. He offered me a new life, too.”</p><p>“You ended up worse!” She wailed, openly crying.  “Were there sexual favors?”</p><p>“Mom, Brian didn’t make me do anything I wasn’t comfortable with.”</p><p>“That’s what everyone under the Stockholm Syndrome says, baby.”</p><p>“Mom, Brian is not the bad guy. You met him. He said you guys talked.” Justin looked at her pleadingly, willing her to see reason. “Brian saved me, Mom. He’s all I had for a while.”</p><p>She stroked his hair out of his eyes, smiling softly. “This Brian is the man who was with you when I saw you at the diner?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“He’s a nice man. He and the waitress sat me down and we had a chat.”</p><p>Justin nodded. “He told me. He said you promised to keep your distance until I came to terms with everything. You broke that promise.”</p><p>“Can you blame me?” She brushed his cheek lovingly. “I’ve tried finding you. I even went to the police, Justin. But I have this feeling that Craig was a step behind me the whole time, wiping all my traces.”</p><p>“Damn. Did you even think of searching Liberty Avenue?”</p><p>She shook her head sadly. “I should have, considering you were so sure when you told us that you were gay.”</p><p>“But you didn’t. I don’t blame you. I guess it’s hard to give up what you believe in.”</p><p>His mom sniffed loudly. “I believe in you, sweetie. I should have searched harder, but then I focused on my divorce. When Daphne called with her news, it was like a ray of hope dropped into my miserable life. I’ve been trying to make ends meet for Molly. Your father is wiring money for Molly, but it’s difficult.”</p><p>“Did you get a job?”</p><p>“Yes. I’m a real estate agent.”</p><p>“Sweet! I’m going to pursue my dream of becoming an artist once I finish high school. I told Brian that I want to go to PIFA. He said he’d help with money, but I’ve been saving up so he doesn’t have to pay an absurd amount.”</p><p>“That salary at the diner must be out of this world.” She laughed.</p><p>“Oh, not that. I’ve been working on a comic book with Brian's ex. It’s complicated. Don’t try to understand. That’s a story for another time.”</p><p>“I’m so proud of you, honey! You’ve grown up so much.”</p><p>“I had to. In order to survive.”</p><p>“Jus!”</p><p>Justin turned around to see his eight-year-old sister in the doorway. He opened his arms for her to dive into them. He hugged her tightly, squeezing his eyes shut.</p><p>“Molly,” he breathed out. He had no idea how much he’d missed that brat until he had her in his arms.</p><p>“Where have you been?”</p><p>“Around…” Justin caught his mother’s eye. “But I’m here now.”</p><p>“You’ll live with us again?” Molly asked, hopefully.</p><p>Justin stiffened. “I’m not sure about that.”</p><p>“You know that we can always make room,” his mom said eagerly.</p><p>“I live with Brian, Mom. We’re happy. We’ll stay in touch. I promise.”</p><p>“Is Brian your boyfriend?”</p><p>Both Justin and his mother turned to stare at Molly.</p><p>“What? You said Justin liked boys.”</p><p>Justin laughed, feeling carefree. “Yes, Molly. Brian is my boyfriend.”</p><p>“How old is he, Justin?” His mother asked, concerned. “It seemed to me he’s a grown man.”</p><p>“Thirty-one. And please, don’t start on his age.”</p><p>“Are you happy?”</p><p>“Yes, Mom. Very much.” Justin allowed Molly to go to the empty chair opposite them at the table. “Now, enough about me. Tell me about how it is to be single again.”</p><p>His mom laughed loudly. “I might be single, but I’m a single mother. So Molly comes first.”</p><p>They kept talking until Justin’s ringing phone interrupted their chat. He answered, chewing on the hamburger his mom had made for him and his sister.</p><p>“Are you still with your mom?” Brian asked</p><p>“Uh, yeah,” Justin answered through a mouthful of burger.</p><p>“Are you having a sleepover? It’s nine.”</p><p>“It is? Oh, God. No.” Justin finally managed to swallow his bite. “Uh, could you come pick me up?”</p><p>“In twenty minutes. I’m back at Babylon now.”</p><p>“Business or pleasure?” Justin joked.</p><p>“Fucking business.”</p><p>“That didn’t clear it up.”</p><p>“You’re a twat, you know that? See you later!”</p><p>By the time Brian arrived, Justin was stuffed with food and all caught-up with his mother and sister. When the doorbell rang, his mother excused herself to go answer.</p><p>“I knew you’d come back,” Molly said suddenly. “Remember? You promised me to always be there for me.”</p><p>Justin gave her a watery smile. “You still remember that?”</p><p>“Of course! So, you better not disappear again.”</p><p>“I won’t. I promise.” Justin could hear voices in the hallway. “I better go… uh…” He got up, hugged Molly tightly, then walked into the hallway.</p><p>Brian was standing tall and handsome in the hallway. He met Justin's eyes, and just like that, Justin melted, gravitating into his arms.</p><p>“Hi,” Justin whispered, leaning up for a soft kiss.</p><p>“Hey.” Brian licked his lips, pulling away. “Your mother was just asking me when she could see you again.”</p><p>Justin twisted in Brian's arms to face his mom. “Let me know when you want to see me. In between school and work, I’ll drop by,” Justin promised. “I’m back,” he insisted. “Like I told Molly a minute ago, you guys have me back for good. The only difference is that I won’t live with you.”</p><p>“Are you sure about that?” She pressed.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>His mom took his face in her hands, kissing his cheeks soundly. “It’s so good to have you back, sweetie! Thank you for taking care of him, Brian.”</p><p>Brian only nodded. Then with an arm around Justin's shoulders, they left her house.</p><p>“How was it?” Brian asked when they were in the Jeep.</p><p>“Not as painful as I thought it would be,” Justin replied, buckling up. “So, is everything okay at Babylon?”</p><p>“Just planning new stuff, and I want everything to work out when the big nights come.”</p><p>“What stuff?”</p><p>“Theme nights, theme parties.” Brian shrugged. “You’ll see.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>The first party was held at the end of October with the theme being Halloween. Justin had never seen Babylon so sinister looking, but he loved the fluorescent paint used on the patrons’ bodies. He had cobwebs on his back and a bat on his cheek.</p><p>The next party was the best in Justin’s opinion: pole-dancing, with the winner getting free drinks for the rest of the night.</p><p>But Brian had pushed him against a wall, shouting in his face that he was forbidden to apply for the contest when he’d seen Justin searching the crowd for the MC drag queen.</p><p>“When does the contest start?” Emmett lamented a while later, leaning against the bar.</p><p>“When there are at least ten brave queers lined up,” Brian explained. “I’m starting to doubt this.”</p><p>Justin frowned, keeping his arms folded across his chest. He absolutely hated being treated like a child.</p><p>“What’s up with <em>you</em>?” Emmett elbowed Justin in the side.</p><p>“Tummy ache,” he lied through his teeth.</p><p>“Then you should head home,” Brian said loudly, suddenly invading his personal space. “We don’t want you getting sick here.”</p><p>“I’ll stay.” Justin made to escape, but Brian grabbed his arm. “I’m going to piss! Do you want to hold my dick for me?”</p><p>“No thanks. I’m not ready to babysit your ass. Just keep your promise. I’ll sample that fine ass over there.” Brian nodded to some new guy he hadn’t seen before.</p><p>“I thought you promised no other guys tonight.”</p><p>“Well, I’ve changed my mind.”</p><p>“Fuck you,” Justin spat, hurrying away. He didn’t pay attention to where he was going, blinded by the tears in his eyes.</p><p>Maybe at the beginning of their relationship, he’d been okay with Brian tricking, but they’d grown really close. Brian had admitted to liking him, to thinking of Justin as his partner, yet he kept fucking other men. Justin had only fucked other guys a few times, and only with Brian at his side in the backroom. And that was because Brian had insisted it would be hot.</p><p>“Uh, huh! What’s troubling a fine thing like yourself?” A gruff voice asked from behind the stairs leading to the bathroom.</p><p>Justin froze, chilled with fear. Then he noticed it was only Sheba, the MC. He wiped at his tears, his lips quivering.</p><p>“Oh, no!” Sheba took him in her arms. She was wearing a flimsy dress that reminded Justin of Marilyn Monroe. “He doesn’t deserve your tears.”</p><p>“But he doesn’t care how I feel. We’re supposed to be in a relationship, but he keeps fucking other guys. I thought I’d be okay with this, but I’m not. And he doesn’t see it. He doesn’t care,” Justin said, hiccupping loudly.</p><p>“Shh.” Sheba offered him a Kleenex. “I have just the thing for you. There’s one spot left for the contest. Want to show him what he’s about to lose if he keeps up that attitude?”</p><p>Justin smiled, glad someone he didn’t even know could understand him. Sheba didn’t even know who his boyfriend was, but she was willing to help.</p><p>“Now. Tell me your name, three things about yourself, and what song you’d like to dance to.”</p><p>“Justin. I love to draw, older assholes who don’t care how I feel, and uh, dancing.”</p><p>Sheba smiled indulgently, writing down everything. “The song? Or we could pick anything.”</p><p>“Please make sure you have it. <em>Private Dancer</em> by Tina Turner.”</p><p>“Oooh! I smell history behind that song.”</p><p>Justin gave her a watery smile. “Thank you.”</p><p>“No worries. The contest is about to start, so you’d better stay close to the stage. We’ll only take two breaks in between the contestants.”</p><p>She turned, ready to go, when Justin touched her shoulder. “Wait. What are the rules for this stripping show?”</p><p>“Go as wild as you dare. If you decide to show them the goodies, we aren’t responsible for the crowd’s reaction.”</p><p>“No goodies.” Justin nodded. He went to piss, and to his surprise, he found Ted kissing some guy by the sinks. He hadn’t seen Ted with anyone before.</p><p>When Justin returned to the bar, Emmett was joined by Michael and Ben. Brian was gone, probably plowing his way through the backroom.</p><p>“Is Brian busy with organizing this thing?” Michael shouted over the loud music.</p><p>“I don’t give a fuck about where Brian is!” Justin shouted louder. “Vodka!” He ordered at the bartender. With his drink of choice in hand, he faced a stunned Michael. “He’s an asshole today.”</p><p>“What has he done?”</p><p>“I don’t want to talk about it.”</p><p>The contest started. The men on the stage had very imaginative costumes, which worried Justin, because he didn’t have one. His cargo pants and shirt had to do the trick.</p><p>With several more vodkas on board and Number Seven performing onstage, Justin was ready to make his way over and find Sheba. That was when Brian joined them.</p><p>Brian’s pupils were dilated in a way Justin knew all too well. He’d taken something. Justin entertained the thought that their little fight had upset Brian, too.</p><p>“Let’s dance!” Brian took his hands.</p><p>“What happened to the new guy?” Justin bit back.</p><p>“Not my type.”</p><p>“Tough luck.” Justin squeezed past a stunned Brian, going in search of Sheba.</p><p>He found her at the side of the stage in another get-up, a long Victorian dress. She was powdering her nose.</p><p>“Hi,” Justin whispered, trying not to startle her.</p><p>She still jumped, startled nonetheless. “Oh, it’s you. Ready?”</p><p>Number Eight had made his way to the stage, yet another firefighter teasing the crowd with his big hose.</p><p>“I’m scared,” Justin admitted, worrying the hem of his shirt.</p><p>“No need, hon. Besides, we have enough time to find you some decent clothing for your act.”</p><p>“What’s wrong with my clothes?”</p><p>“You want the crowd salivating over your ass, not losing their boners.”</p><p>Justin blushed furiously, following Sheba to a makeshift wardrobe. There were her dresses for tonight thrown on the floor, and a rack full of costumes for the contestants.</p><p>Justin stood aside while she browsed. She returned to his side with a short vest with fringes and a cowboy hat. Justin discarded his shirt, putting the vest on and feeling more naked than in his days at the peep show. His cargo pants stayed, because they were easy to unbutton.</p><p>Sheba handed him a tube of glitter. “Use it wisely.” She winked, before heading to the stage to introduce Number Nine.</p><p>Justin’s fingers shook as he applied glitter on his chest. He felt like throwing up, as a flashback of his nights behind the glass window assaulted him. The nights when he had to entertain Sap’s friends.</p><p>Just as he was about to chicken out, he heard Sheba’s voice booming from the stage.</p><p>“May I have your attention, boys and boys? The last contestant loves the Powerpuff Girls, Margaritas, and older men who take him for granted! Here’s...Justin!”</p><p>Justin would have been amused by the description if he weren’t so nervous. The intro of <em>Private Dancer</em> started as he walked slowly to the stage. Sheba winked as he passed her.</p><p>On the stage, the only better-illuminated place other than the bar, Justin went to the pole. He closed his eyes, getting transported to the first night he’d danced for Brian. Instead of fucking against the window, he used the pole.</p><p>The first thing to fly toward the public was his cowboy hat, then the vest. Justin unbuckled his pants, keeping the pole between his shoulder blades, hips bucking up.</p><p>He was relaxed enough by then to look around. The crowd was wild, salivating. But his eyes were on the bar.</p><p>Brian had some unknown guy next to him, completely forgotten as he was enticed by Justin's dance. Justin felt a stab of pain, because Brian had actually gone after someone else when the first guy hadn’t been what he wanted. The truth was, Brian had everything he needed in Justin, and Justin was about to show him.</p><p>Justin turned around, bending over. The crowd cheered at his ass on display. Then he took his pants off, throwing them to the corner of the stage. He’d need them later.</p><p>He kept dancing around the pole, wrapping a leg around it and throwing his head back, shaking his ass, then grabbed the pole with both hands and jumped up. He kept himself secure with his legs locked around the pole, dangling upside down.</p><p>Fleetingly, he noticed Brian was no longer at the bar. His abandoned trick was slack-jawed, staring at the stage. Like everyone else, apparently.</p><p>Justin shimmied down the pole, hooking a finger in the side of his briefs. Before he could tease the crowd further, the lights went out.</p><p><em>What a time for a blackout</em>, he thought sorrowfully.</p><p>Then strong hands grabbed him, taking him away. His shout of terror was swallowed by a hand covering his mouth. The distinctive scent of Brian’s cologne and his very essence partially relaxed Justin, but not enough for him to stop struggling against his kidnapper.</p><p>A door was slammed shut, then he heard Brian's firm yet soft voice. “Turn it back on, Bob.”</p><p>Justin blinked at the harsh neon light in Brian's office at Babylon.</p><p>Brian was standing in front of him, glaring daggers, but there was a fire in his eyes.</p><p>“You have about five seconds to explain what that was all about!” Brian breathed out.</p><p>Justin couldn’t find his voice. He was still shaking at being abducted.</p><p>“Have you lost your mind?” Brian was in his face.</p><p>“Oh, so you didn’t like it?” Justin finally spoke, albeit shakily.</p><p>“Oh, I liked it way <em>too </em>much. Just like all the other queers in the room! You should have heard them as I made my way to you.”</p><p>“Good. At least they sincerely wanted me.” Justin huffed.</p><p>“They wanted your body!”</p><p>“Yeah, unlike you, they wanted a part of me.”</p><p>“You think I don’t want you?” Brian asked, slowly.</p><p>“You have a funny way of showing it if you do.”</p><p>Brian pressed Justin into the wall, his hot breath fanning over Justin's face. “I always want you, Justin. I thought you understood the terms of this relationship.”</p><p>“Maybe I’ve changed my mind! Maybe I don’t want to share you anymore! You promised we’d have fun tonight. Then we got here and you saw that guy who, I should add, turned out not to be your type.”</p><p>“Because lately no one satisfies me anymore!” Brian shouted. “All I want is you!”</p><p>“You already have me, asshole!” Justin shouted in his face. “So, if you don’t want to lose me, you’d better make up your mind.”</p><p>Brian rested his forehead against Justin’s. “We’re allowed to go out and have fun with others, but we always come back home. By three on the weekends, and midnight for you during school nights.”</p><p>Justin wanted to protest, but he found a window of opportunity. “And you only kiss me on the lips.”</p><p>Brian pulled away a little, searching Justin's blue eyes. Then he leaned in for a kiss, sealing their deal.</p><p>A moment later, Brian spun Justin to face the wall, pushing his briefs down. As he pounded into him, Brian gasped about how hot Justin had been on the stage.</p><p>When they resurfaced, they went to Sheba’s make-shift wardrobe to collect Justin's clothes.</p><p>“There you are!” Sheba exclaimed. “If you’d excuse me, Mr. Kinney. I have to announce the winner.”</p><p>Justin only had time to put his pants on before Sheba pulled him onto the stage, introducing him as the King of Babylon. He even received a little crown.</p><p>When he descended, Brian flicked at his crown, leaning in for a kiss.</p><p>“I want you to fuck me wearing this crown. Only the crown,” Justin whispered.</p><p>“You kinky fucker.”</p><p>With Justin’s shirt back on him, they returned to the bar. Their friends started cheering, impressed with Justin’s braveness.</p><p>“Too bad this jealous queen ruined my epic finale,” Justin commented, poking his tongue out at Brian.</p><p>“You caused the blackout?” Emmett gasped.</p><p>“You kidnapped him?” Michael cried out.</p><p>“I don’t know why you sound so surprised. No one gets to see Justin’s ass. That’s mine.”</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>.</p><p>“Why the frowny face?” Michael asked.</p><p>Brian startled, turning to look at his friend. “Just thinking.”</p><p>“Don’t hurt yourself,” Michael joked. “And since when do you do the thinking at Babylon? Where’s Justin?”</p><p>“Studying for some test. The last test before Christmas break.”</p><p>“And you look abandoned.”</p><p>“His birthday is this weekend, remember? He shares the day with Ben.” Brian rolled his eyes. “It will be one year since we moved into the loft.”</p><p>“And you want to do something romantic?”</p><p>“I’ve been thinking of hiring a hustler as a present,” Brian contemplated.</p><p>“If you want Justin to lose any hope of you having any ounce of romance in you…”</p><p>“I don’t <em>do </em>romance!”</p><p>“Well, buy him flowers. Take him on a trip. I don’t know… whatever you think he’d like. Really, Brian! Where’s your common sense?” Michael huffed. “You used to be more romantic when we were together.”</p><p>Brian cringed, downing his glass.</p><p>“Shit. You know what I mean.”</p><p>“Yeah. I could take him skiing. He mentioned his parents used to take him to the mountains when he was little.”</p><p>“See? Much better.”</p><p>Brian pulled Michael to the dance floor.</p><p>“What…” Michael tried resisting.</p><p>“We haven’t danced in ages.” Brian held him close. “Besides, they’re playing our song.”</p><p>Michael cocked his head to the side, smiling when he heard the lyrics of <em>Proud</em>. “I haven’t heard this song in years.”</p><p>“I made sure to include it on the playlist for old time’s sake.”</p><p>“You’re a sap.”</p><p>Brian scowled. “See if I ever do nice things for you.”</p><p>Michael smiled warmly, embracing Brian. “I’m so happy we saved our friendship. I was so worried it was over when you said you knew.”</p><p>Brian cupped Michael's face, kissing him on the lips. “I’ll always love you, Mikey. Our friendship is stronger than ever.”</p><p>“I agree. Always have, always will.” Michael stiffened as he looked over Brian's shoulder. “Justin’s here.”</p><p>Brian turned to see Justin staring at them with wide, scared eyes. “Shit.” He abandoned Michael in the middle of the dance floor, heading to the door. Justin had already made his way out of the club.</p><p>“Justin!” Brian ran after him, shrugging on his jacket.</p><p>“What the hell was that?” Justin stopped a few feet away, spinning to face Brian.</p><p>“If I say it wasn’t what you think it was, you won’t believe me.”</p><p>“I’m so done with your mind games, Brian!” Justin retreated to the mouth of the alley.</p><p>“Stop running away from me!” Brian caught up with him. He kept his arms around Justin, looking him in the eye. “This is who I am. And what you saw – that’s my way of showing Michael that I still love him...as my best friend. We’ve always kissed like that, even before we decided to get married. It’s our thing.”</p><p>Justin refused to meet his eyes.</p><p>“What’s with this insecurity, Sunshine?”</p><p>“You’ve been extra secretive lately.”</p><p>Brian stifled a smile. He’d actually been searching for resorts in Vermont where he could take Justin away for Christmas break and as a birthday present, but then he thought that would be too romantic and opted for the hustler. Michael had opened his eyes earlier. Justin loved romance.</p><p>“Presents are supposed to be a surprise. I am working on my present for you,” Brian explained.</p><p>“Oh!” Justin’s shiny eyes met his. “A present? For me?”</p><p>“Your birthday is coming up.”</p><p>“You remembered that!” He gasped.</p><p>“It's the day we decided to embark on this insanity,” Brian whispered in his ear. “I’ve never regretted any decision I’ve made in my entire life, and bringing you into my life was the best decision I’ve ever made.” He kissed under Justin's left ear. “I love you.”</p><p>Justin pulled away to gape at him, searching his eyes.</p><p>“I love you,” Brian repeated.</p><p>“I love you so much!” Justin cried out, hugging him tightly.</p><p>They joined the others at the bar. Brian met Michael’s worried eyes over Justin’s head, and nodded, smiling. Michael returned his smile, leaning into Ben’s arms.</p><p>Maybe he’d taken a few wrong turns in his life, but eventually he’d found the right path. Brian was ready to keep walking the right path with Justin by his side, and he’d always keep Mikey close. Despite everything, he was his best friend, the only person who had befriended him in high school, the only person who had understood his troubles at home and had opened his door for him whenever things had turned rough at his house.</p><p>Justin handed him a whiskey glass, grinning. Brian accepted it, kissing his lips. Relationships weren’t hell if they were shared with the right person.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hoping you enjoyed this ride, let me know your thoughts.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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